


Dreams Fade Away

by Seokhani



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Lee Felix (Stray Kids)-centric, M/M, Memories, Mentioned Other K-pop Artist(s), Minor Character Death, Non-Sexual, Repressed Memories, Violence, injuries, maze
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2020-10-05 21:50:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 31,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20495891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seokhani/pseuds/Seokhani
Summary: Felix wakes up in a cold, white room. He remembers nothing, no one. Life is simple in his little cage, with his seven other friends. Until one day, a ninth boy shows up, and everything changes.My interpretation of the canonical Stray Kids MV story.





	1. Chapter 1

Felix had stopped counting the days. He had the distinct feeling that it had been over a year, but that’s as close as he could get. He rolled over, trying to ignore the humming of the white light that had just flicked on above him. His wall was littered with tally marks from the first days, before he’d given up. _87._ That’s where he stopped. His pencil had finally broken, and that was it. They wouldn’t give him another one. 

He sat up, the thin blanket slipping off his shoulders and falling onto the shoddy mattress below him. The room looked the same as always: smooth white walls, gray tiled floor, and a thick white metal door with a small window. He swung himself around, feet landing on the cold floor. 

“Felix,” he murmured. He ran a hand through his hair, combing out some of the tangles. One of his fingers dragged over the scar behind his ear. It was totally healed now, unlike the first day he woke up in this room. His pillow still had a faded smear of blood from where he’d rested his head when the wound was fresh. All of them had the same mark: a long, curved incision above their right ear. He reached up now, feeling across the crescent-shaped cut. In the past, he had dimly wondered where it came from and why. Not that it mattered. It was there now. 

“Felix,” he said again, standing and stretching. Every morning he reminded himself of his name. It was the only thing he remembered about himself. He didn’t need the reminder anymore, but it had become a habit. He was clueless as to how he’d gotten here, and what his life might have been like before. Most of the time he felt like it had always been this way, but something nagged at him, telling him there was more to it. He thought hard, forcing his brain to conjure up the memory, the only thing he could remember that wasn’t found inside these walls. _The red flower._ That’s it. The only thing he recalled from outside this room was a red flower, with soft curved petals and a long green stem. On his better days, if he concentrated hard enough, he could smell it. Maybe it had come to him in a dream? It felt real, but he couldn’t be sure. 

After relieving himself in the metal basin behind his bed, he took up his usual post: standing in front of the small window in his door, looking out at the other cells. Felix’s cell was the furthest to the left, near the doors where the keepers entered and exited. To his right were three other cells. There were four on the opposite wall, all seemingly identical to his. At the end on the far wall, furthest from his door, there was a single cell, a little bit bigger than the rest. The boy in there had been here the longest. Felix knew his name to be Chan. 

According to that guy, all the boys had trickled in over the course of a few months. Sometimes it was what seemed like a week in between, other times it was many weeks. Currently, all the cells were occupied except for one. The cell straight across from Felix had always been empty, as long as he could remember anyway. The one next to it used to be empty, until the most recent boy came along, a week after Felix. It had been a long time since then. 

That was a day he remembered. Most of the time, the days blended one into another. Sometimes he felt like their awake time fluctuated, lasting only a few hours one day and then stretching out for an impossibly long time the next, although he had no way to measure that. The only way they could distinguish between day and night was when the lights turned out and the small nightlights beside each bed flicked on. Anyway, when the new boy had shown up, Felix had been at his window, staring out at the row of doors across from him.

The door to his left had rolled open, the keepers walking in with an unfamiliar person. He wore the same stark white clothes as Felix and the others, instead of the blue clothes that the keepers wore. Felix had pressed himself close to the window, surprised to see someone new. As they walked closer, he was taken aback by the boy’s sleek red hair. He had fierce eyes and a frown on his face, but Felix could tell the boy was scared. He’d absent-mindedly reached up to run his fingers over his scar, wondering if that boy had one too. He’d come to find out later that he did. 

They’d led him to one of the empty cells, shoving him inside and slamming the door behind him. Felix lingered by the window, hoping to catch his eye. From the angle he was at, he could just barely see the boy, sitting on his bed and staring at the floor. He sat that way until the lights went out that night, barely moving. Felix met him the next day, in the courtyard. All the boy remembered was his name, Jeongin. 

It was almost courtyard time now, Felix guessed, shifting his weight from one foot to another. Every day they were given a short period of time to mingle in the indoor courtyard and eat their daily meal. The doors would suddenly unlock, and the large door beside Chan’s cell would raise up, opening to a huge, windowless warehouse that was mocked up to look like a garden. Just inside, there were two shower stalls where they could clean themselves. They’d come up with a schedule that worked pretty well so that everyone got a turn every few days. Past that, there was a picnic table that was always laid out with a plate of food and some water for each of them. 

Behind the picnic table, there was a large structure that consumed the rest of the room. Chan called it the maze. There were walls taller than Felix, covered in fake green plants. In the dim light of the room, they were nearly black. There was an entrance, and then a long, winding path of dead ends, open sections, and rows and rows of walls. Every few feet, a white spotlight was placed behind the strings of fake ivy, lighting up most of the maze. Sometimes they wandered around in it, sometimes they didn’t. There weren’t given very much time every day, and to be frank, Felix was a little scared of what might be in there.

Woojin had gotten lost in there once, and he’d failed to return to the door when the bell rang, signalling the return to their cells. They wandered back, looking over their shoulders and wondering what to do. Felix was scared to find out what happened if he wasn’t in his room when the second bell sounded. Eventually, three of the keepers brough Woojin back to his room, throwing him inside. The next three days, Woojin’s door didn’t open when the rest of theirs did. Felix had snuck a glance inside on the first day and spotted him with a bruise on his forehead and blood at the corner of his mouth. It was all gone when his door opened again, and he never mentioned it. 

Felix was so lost in his memory of that day that he was startled when his door rolled open. He stepped out, glancing around at the others. He looked over at his closest neighbor, a short, energetic boy named Changbin. Felix smiled. “Hello, Binnie.” 

Changbin smiled back. “Bin bin.” 

Felix patted him on the back, steering him to the open garden door. Every time Changbin spoke, Felix was leveled with the realization that always hung somewhere in the back of his mind: something terrible had happened to all of them. Changbin could only say his name, no matter how hard he tried or how much they tried to teach him other words. Just his name, that’s it. 

Felix looked around again. They each had some kind of damage. Minho walked with a bit of a limp, some days worse than others. Woojin’s voice was raspy, like his throat had been hurt. Sometimes Chan had seizures, with little warning beforehand. Jeongin could only see out of one eye. Felix was hopelessly apathetic, and he didn’t have the ability to focus very well. Everyone else had something, but they didn’t talk about it much. Changbin’s was usually the most noticeable. 

It certainly didn’t stop him from talking though. Whenever he and Felix were together, he chattered on, gesturing wildly. Felix smiled, turning to him as they passed through the door. 

Changbin turned to Felix. “Bin binnie Changbinnie, bin-bin?” He looked up at him, waiting for a response.

Felix shrugged. “I dunno, man.” They didn’t really know if Changbin could understand them, but they humored him anyway. It’s not like it mattered much either way. They ate, and slept, and survived. That’s really all they could do.

Felix felt protective of Changbin though, for whatever reason. And what did he feel like he needed to protect him from? Probably best to not examine it. They sat down at the picnic table, the other boys filing in behind them. Chan sat down beside Felix, nudging his shoulder.

“When do you think the next person will show up?” Chan paused momentarily, shovelling in a mouthful of rice. He chewed for a second and went on. “There’s one room left.”

“How do you know there _is_ a next person?” Felix turned to him, exhausted by this conversation already. 

Across from them, Jisung spoke up. “I mean there’s one empty room left, why wouldn’t there be one more person?” 

Felix shrugged. “It’s been so long now. If there was another person, wouldn’t they already be here?”

“I THINK THERE’S PROBABLY ONE MORE,” Seungmin shouted suddenly from across the table. Minho jumped and dropped his fork, startled. Seungmin was quite hard of hearing, nearly deaf sometimes. He didn’t mean to be so loud, and Felix realized he couldn’t help it. He tried to be understanding.

Felix shook his head. “I don’t know. I just have a feeling that there was supposed to be someone there, and there’s not. So maybe there won’t be.” 

Minho looked over, staring at Felix for a moment. “You have a lot of feelings about things.” 

Felix shrugged. “I don’t know where it comes from. I just feel it.” 

He noticed Minho studying him for a second longer before turning back to his food. Felix had these little premonitions from time to time, usually nothing major. He had predicted a big change was coming in the days leading up to Jeongin’s appearance. After that, the boys listened a lot more closely when he spoke. 

Jeongin sat down at the end of the table, bumping shoulders with Changbin affectionately. “When are we exploring the maze again?” 

Chan leaned over to look at him. “Soon! I have an idea.”

Felix rolled his eyes. Chan always had an idea. Nothing ever came of them. Day after day, they were still here. There was no getting out. There were no windows, no doors. They were here for a reason, right? 

Everyone went back to eating while Chan chattered on. “I feel like if we get far enough in the maze, we can find the clearing again. There has to be something there, right? Why else would there be a clearing?”

Jisung shook his head. “No, we need to go further past the clearing. There has to be something at the end, right?”

Woojin spoke up, his voice strained. “Don’t go too far, you know? Don’t get lost.”

The others stopped talking then, poking at their food. Woojin had learned that lesson just by mistake, taking one for the team, as it were. 

“WHAT DID HE SAY?” Seungmin squinted toward Woojin, as though it would help him hear better.

“Binnie bin binnie, Changbinnie bin!” Changbin gestured between Seungmin and Woojin. 

Minho smirked. “Good work as always, Changbin.”

Changbin grinned, turning to Felix. “Bin-bin?”

Felix nodded. “Whatever you say, mate.” 

They ate and bantered a little more, before the bell sounded and they wandered back to their rooms. Felix squeezed Changbin’s shoulder one last time before they parted ways, earning a wide smile from him. Felix settled back into his room as the bell sounded again, the door rolling shut. 

And that was that, another day had gone by. Felix sat on his bed for a while, and then stood in front of the door for a while longer, making faces whenever Jeongin wandered by his window. Hours passed and his feet started to hurt so he laid down, waiting for the lights to go off. They finally flickered out a while later, his room lit by the soft, warm glow of his nightlight. He liked it better like this. It almost felt like a place he wanted to be. He reached down, pulling the covers up over himself. 

Without the buzzing of the lights, he could hear the others milling around. Changbin was chattering to himself, syllables getting further and further apart as he drifted into sleep. Once he had quieted down, Felix could hear someone crying. It might have been Jisung, maybe Seungmin. Felix felt a pang in his chest. He felt sad for the others, but he felt nothing for himself. It was as though his soul was just empty, emotionless. He had nothing left. Maybe he had nothing to begin with. He knew that was his injury: an emotional one in contrast to the physical ones carried by his friends. Friends? That word floated around in Felix’s head pretty often. He guessed they were friends, not that they had much choice. 

His eyelids suddenly felt heavy, and he slipped them closed. He normally fell right into sleep, but not tonight. He kept thinking of the flower, its rich red petals soft like velvet. How did he know that? Whatever. He could recall the smell now, fresh and earthy. He could remember the feeling of the soft petals against his nose as he inhaled. 

_Felix._

His eyes snapped open. He looked around, but the room was still empty and quiet. Had he just imagined someone saying his name? That didn’t sound like the voice of any of the others. Was it part of the memory? His heart was racing and his palms felt clammy. The voice didn’t speak again. He rolled over, closing his eyes once more. He focused on the soft sniffles of someone a few doors down, slipping finally into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long boi but I've gotten quite a bit written already so please stick with me! Content warnings: there will be quite a bit of violence and some death (no skz members die), but I swear I won't leave you guys with a sad ending. Everyone will be okay somehow, promise
> 
> Also yes I have another fanfiction I should be writing but I'm almost done with it too please don't kill me~ ^^


	2. Chapter 2

The lights clicked on again and Felix’s eyes snapped open, waking him from a terrible dream. He’d been having them all night. He sat up, hugging the blanket around himself. He struggled to recall the nightmares exactly, but he remembered blood, lots of it. He rubbed his eyes, smearing away the tears that were about to fall. Felix shivered, looking around and listening carefully. Nothing seemed out of order. He desperately hoped this wasn’t another of his premonitions. The eight of them had become a little family in the time they’d all been there. Felix couldn’t stand the idea of losing any of them. “Felix,” he murmured, trying to calm himself. 

He rolled back over, closing his eyes. He felt more tired this morning than he did last night, almost as though he didn’t sleep at all. Felix tugged the blanket up over his eyes, burying his face down into his pillow.

The next thing he knew, he was being shaken awake. He woke with a start, bolting up to find Minho sitting on the edge of his bed. “Wh-what?”

Minho grinned. “It’s courtyard time. You were still asleep, so I came to wake you.” 

Felix nodded, running his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. I had a lot of bad dreams last night. I guess I was still tired.” 

Minho tilted his head, leveling him with a look. “It’s no problem.” He cleared his throat. “Do you remember the dreams?” 

Felix shrugged. “A little. I remember blood.” He caught Minho’s eyes, wide with surprise. “A lot of blood. I’m worried about what it means.” He fidgeted with the hem of the blanket, trying to remember. “I think I saw people I hadn’t seen before. People who aren’t here. We weren’t here, we were somewhere else.” 

Minho nodded. “What did they look like?” 

“I can’t really remember. But they weren’t bad people, I think. They were like us.” 

Minho grinned again. “Yeah? And what are we?” 

Felix groaned. “I don’t know.” He looked in the direction of the keepers’ door, the area they were very rarely allowed to go. “I just know we’re not like them.” 

Minho nodded, moving to stand. “Come on, let’s go eat before Jisung eats your bread again.” Felix stood, taking the hand Minho offered to help him up. 

The other boys were chatting excitedly as Felix and Minho took their places at the table. Jisung leaned forward, eyeing Felix through his large, round glasses. “What took you so long?”

Felix shrugged, poking at his rice. Minho answered. “Felix had some bad dreams. He just needed a little more sleep.” 

Felix felt Chan stiffen next to him, but he said nothing. Felix spoke up. “It was probably nothing. None of us were really in the dream, as far as I remember. I just know we were somewhere else, not here. I saw other people.” 

Jisung slouched, resting his chin on his palm. “Could it be the new guy?” 

Felix shook his head. “No, this was something else. I don’t know what.” The table fell silent.

Minho thankfully changed the subject, ribbing Jeongin for missing his scheduled turn for the shower. “You’re starting to smell like potatoes.”

Jeongin bared his teeth. Seungmin leaned over, and Minho clapped his hands over his ears.

“HE CAN HAVE MY TURN TODAY, I THINK I’M GOOD FOR A FEW MORE DAYS.” 

Jeongin shook his head. “Who gives a shit? We all smell terrible. Besides, I want to investigate the maze some more.” 

Chan leaned over, pulling a piece of paper out of his shirt pocket. “I’ve started mapping out the first few rows of the maze, and I think if we do a little every day, we could map the whole thing out soon enough.” 

Woojin’s fork clattered down. “What good will that do?” he rasped. “The maze is huge. It goes so far back we can’t even see the end of this building. Who knows how much there is? Do you guys want to get killed?”

Chan scoffed. “So what, you’d rather just live the rest of your life in a cage?”

Woojin chuckled, a hollow sound. “What life, Chan? This is all I’ve ever known. It’s all any of us have ever known. How do we know what’s outside of these walls?”

“We’ll never know unless we try to get there!” 

Woojin shook his head, standing to leave. “Fine, go get yourself killed. But don’t drag everyone else along with you.” He stalked away from the table and back toward their cells. 

Jisung shook his head. “Don’t pay him any mind, Chan. You know he’s still fucked up from the time he got lost in there.” 

Felix muttered under his breath, “No, he’s fucked up because they beat him up for it.” 

Everyone turned to look at him. Chan leaned around to look him in the eyes. “What?” 

Felix sighed. “When he got back the next day, after he was lost, he had a bruise on his forehead. Didn’t you notice how stiff he was for the next week?” He shrugged. “They probably roughed him up for getting lost.” 

Chan nodded. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense. I should apologize to him.” 

Felix shrugged. “Won’t fix anything.” 

They finished eating in silence. Minho got up to shower, followed by Jisung. Felix found himself staring at the maze. There weren’t any overhead lights, just the spotlights that lit up the maze from inside. The glow seemed to extend far back into the building, further than Felix could see. It’s impossible to tell how far the maze might go. 

The bell rang a while later, shaking Felix from his thoughts. The boys all trudged back to their rooms, filtering in before the doors closed. Felix caught sight of Woojin, sitting on his bed with his head in his hands. 

He walked into his own room, tensing a little at the heavy sound of the door rolling closed behind him. Woojin was right. This was the only life he’d ever known. He couldn’t remember what came before this, if anything at all. He knew that some of the others felt a pull, something drawing them to escape, to ask questions about why they were here, how they got here. Felix didn’t have that pull. Most of the time he didn’t feel anything at all. He was just empty.

He clutched his chest. A sob suddenly racked its way through him. He slid down to the floor, leaning back against the door. He felt really, truly empty inside. There was a hole in his heart. Something had been taken from him, but he couldn't remember what. Something important. He was terrified that he might never figure out what it was. His first days here, he tried and tried to recall it, grasping at any wisp of memory. But as the days dragged on, he gave up. It had been a while since it had hit him this way.

He scrubbed at his eyes, trying to wipe the tears away as they fell. Feeling something was better than feeling nothing, he guessed. It was rare that an emotion came upon him like this. He finally calmed a little, dabbing at his tears with his sleeves. The lump in his throat was starting to dissipate.

Felix heard a sound echo behind him. It was muffled, coming from somewhere over in the keepers’ area, but it still reverberated through the floor beneath him. He froze, listening for more. It was rare that they ever heard any disturbance from over there. An icy tendril of dread crept its way into his stomach. There was something bad about that sound. He felt a twinge in his head, a sensation he’d never felt before. It was like a crackling in his brain. He rubbed his temple, trying to will it away. He sat there for a while, trying to understand what was happening inside his head.

He was startled when he heard a door clang behind him. Felix scrambled to stand, looking out through his door’s window. Four keepers came through the door on the far wall, to Felix’s left. They were struggling with something. Felix strained to see what they were doing, limited by the angle of his vantage point. He could hear a commotion now; they seemed to be shouting and scuffling. Finally they came over far enough for Felix to see, and he felt a shock run down his spine.

The keepers were dragging a boy Felix had never seen. The two behind him were shoving his body forward, trying to force him to walk while the two in front of him struggled to hang onto his flailing shoulders. There was a strip of duct tape across his mouth, and his eyes were swollen and wet from crying. It seemed as though his hands were tied behind his back, too. They yanked him along, dragging him when his feet stopped moving. Felix could hear the boy shouting, muffled by the duct tape. He was totally distraught. He was kicking and flailing, digging his heels against the concrete. Felix noticed there was something on the bottom of his shoes, but they were too far away from him to tell what it was.

Felix felt the skin prickle on the back of his neck. This hadn’t happened before. A while back, Chan had described the first time he’d seen each of them. They’d been brought in quietly, placed into their rooms with little circumstance. Felix had been brought to his room in the middle of the night, and he simply woke there in the morning. This was nothing like that. This boy was screaming, desperate. Felix wanted to rip his door off its hinges, yank each one of those keepers away from him. Something was very wrong. He watched as they dragged him to the cell directly across from Felix’s, rolling the door open and tossing him inside. Felix could hear the boy cry out as his elbows hit the hard ground. One of the keepers leaned down, before standing back up and pressing a boot into the boy’s chest, shoving him back to the floor. The man turned around, stomping out of the cell with the strip of duct tape in his hand. The door rolled shut behind him. 

Felix stood frozen, waiting. He was fixed on the boy’s window, listening as hard as he could for any sound coming from behind it. The keepers filed back through their door, grumbling to each other. After their door shut, there was silence. He pressed his ear to the cool metal, listening for anything. All he could hear was his own panicked breathing. He turned back to the window, searching for any sign of the newcomer. In the corner of his eye, he could see Jeongin standing in his window, curious about the commotion. 

What had happened? Where did that boy come from? Chan was right. There was to be one more person, and now he was here. Felix had noticed the boy was probably the same age as the rest of them, although he seemed very skinny. He felt choked up again. He was sure the boy was scared, he’d been crying as they dragged him. 

Felix stood there for as long as he could. The boy didn’t make another sound, didn’t stand or move in front of his window. The lights clicked off, stirring Felix from his post. He reluctantly dragged himself to his bed, feet shuffling over the cold tile. He hoped the boy was okay. 

He sat on his bed, toeing out of his slip-on shoes before swinging his legs up on the mattress. He leaned down to the pillow, but his eyes wouldn’t close. He didn’t feel tired at all. His mind was racing about what this meant, if anything. Why was this time different? The keepers were usually pretty mild-mannered, but this was a violent exchange. He sighed deeply. Answers wouldn’t come to him tonight. He felt the tears start to spill over again. 

His sleep was dreamless and dark. A few hours had gone by when a noise suddenly jolted him awake, causing him to sit up and peer into the darkness. It was still night, his small nightlight shining beside his bed. He listened again, trying to hear whatever it was again. 

He heard a whisper come from behind him. He clambered out of his bed, feet getting tangled in the blanket. He craned his neck around, searching the darkness behind his bed. As his eyes adjusted, he realized he saw nothing there except the toilet and sink. He looked all around his room. It was completely empty. 

The whisper came again, a little louder this time. He ran to the window, looking out. It was dark and still. He tried to calm his breathing, listening intently. It came again, and he staggered back from the door with a start. The voice wasn’t behind him, wasn’t in front of him. It was in his own head. 

“Who’s there?” he whispered to the darkness. Nothing. 

_Felix._

He gasped, falling back onto his bed. He gripped the mattress, trying to ground himself. “Who are you?” he whispered out loud again.

_Felix._

The voice in his head was calling his name. His chest was tight with fear. He recalled the voice he’d heard last night, it must have been in his head too. That voice was different though, a higher pitch. This wasn’t the same one. He squeezed his eyes shut, focusing on his thoughts. 

_Felix. Felix. Felix. Felix. Felix._

It was getting faster now, a chant almost. His brain was in overdrive, trying to explain this turn of events. If the voice was in his head, maybe it could hear him too.

_Who are you?_ he thought, trying to project his intent to communicate. 

The chant stopped, leaving Felix straining to hear. After an impossibly long moment, he heard it again.

_F-Felix? Can you hear me?_

Felix gasped. _I… I hear you._ He felt sweat dripping down his forehead. He swallowed thickly. _Who are you?_

A few more moments passed. Felix leaned forward, pressing his fingers to his temples. 

_I’m the one they dragged in earlier. You probably guessed that. I just… I was told to find you._

Felix stood, looking out the window in the direction of the opposite cell. _Who told you to find me?_

Felix felt a wave of sadness. It didn’t feel like his own. It came from the same place as the voice. 

_A friend._

Felix shook his head, trying to shake off the feeling. _And what about you? What do they call you?_

Another moment of deafening silence dragged by before the voice spoke up again. 

_Hyunjin. They called me Hyunjin._


	3. Chapter 3

_Hyunjin._ Felix said the word in his mind. 

_Yeah, that’s my name, I guess. I don’t really remember anything before coming to this place._

_None of us remember either. Do you…_ Felix paused, not wanting to upset him. _What’s the first thing you remember?_

_I woke up and I was strapped to a chair. I’ve been here for a long time, I think. A year or more._

Felix gasped. Most of them remembered a few minutes before they were brought to their cells, but no more than that. _And you remember it all?_

A pause. _Unfortunately._

Felix was pacing around his room. _Did something… bad happen earlier today?_

The boy didn’t answer for a long time. Felix sat back down, wondering if he’d fallen asleep. Finally he responded.

_Yeah._ His voice sounded small, broken. 

Felix decided not to ask any more about it for the night. _Are you okay? Can you sleep?_

_Maybe. I’m still on the floor. My hands are still tied._

Felix felt a pang of guilt in his chest, wishing he could get to him. _As soon as this door opens, I’ll come free you. I promise._

Somehow, Felix could feel the boy smile. _Thank you, Felix._

\------------------

Felix finally fell asleep, resting for the last few hours until the lights came on. As soon as they did, he leaped up. He muttered his name once to himself as he used the restroom and washed his hands and face, and then he bolted to the door. Now that he was in his right mind and could focus, he noticed something on the floor leading into the cell the new boy was in. The concrete seemed to be streaked with something that was on his shoes as they struggled to throw him in. Could it be dirt? Was he outside?

Felix had never felt this impatient for anything. For the first time in his life here, he couldn’t wait for the door to open. The thought of Hyunjin on the ground, alone, possibly hurt? It turned his stomach. Through the wall to his right, he could hear Changbin muttering. He sounded worried too. He must have seen it happen yesterday. 

What would happen now? All nine rooms were full. No one else would be coming in. Would something be different now? Felix had a brief but paralyzing moment of fear where he considered the possibility that their doors wouldn’t open anymore. What if they’d fulfilled some kind of purpose, and now they’d just be left here? He realized he was shaking as the window became clouded with his nervous breath.

Finally he heard the sound of the door beginning to move, and before it was even fully open he’d squeezed himself out of the gap. He ran across to the other cell at a full sprint. It was maybe twenty paces away but he crossed it so fast the other door hadn’t finished opening all the way. He swung himself through, spotting Hyunjin on the floor just inside the door. He was on his side, his arms tied behind him. Felix dropped to his knees, frantically untying his hands. Changbin must have been right behind him because he ran to the room, panting. 

“Bin bin!” he cried, kneeling in front of Hyunjin and shaking his shoulder gently. 

Felix was working on the knotted rope, finally tugging it free and yanking it off of his hands. Hyunjin had started to stir. Felix rolled him over. 

Hyunjin blinked, adjusting to the light before focusing on Felix. “Are you…”

“Felix,” he panted. 

The others had gathered around the door now, peering in. Felix heard them gasp, softly murmuring to each other. He looked down, following their gaze to Hyunjin’s feet, and his jaw dropped.

Hyunjin’s shoes were soaked in blood. 

It was splattered up on his legs and some on his shirt. There was a large blotch of it on his right knee that seemed to have dripped down his shin. Felix turned back and noticed there were even specks of blood on Hyunjin’s face that he hadn’t seen. How did he not notice that before? Where he’d been laying on his side, it wasn’t as obvious. But now it was all Felix could see, just horrific splashes of red. 

Hyunjin sat up, pulling his knees to his chest and scooting back against the bed. Minho knelt beside him. “Are you hurt?”

Hyunjin shook his head. “No. It’s not mine.” 

Minho looked down, swallowing and composing himself before going on. “A keeper’s?” 

Hyunjin shook his head again. “No.” 

Minho nodded, looking up at the others that stood in the doorway. He turned back to him. “What’s your name?” 

“Hyunjin.” He relaxed a little, but he still looked like he could cry. Minho smiled fondly.

“I’m Minho. I’ll introduce you to everyone in a moment.” 

Hyunjin nodded. “Um, I’m sorry, but I really have to pee.” He scrambled to stand as Minho pointed behind the bed to where the toilet was. Changbin, Felix, and Minho all stood, turning to face away so he could have some privacy. They heard him finish and then wash his hands, but the water kept running. Felix turned back curiously. He was drinking from the faucet, sucking in water like he hadn’t seen any in days. Maybe he hadn’t. Now that he was standing, they could all see how desperately thin he was. 

He straightened up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m sorry.” He hung his head. 

Felix shuffled over, patting him lightly on the shoulder. “No, don’t apologize.” He guided Hyunjin toward the door. “Are you hungry?” 

Hyunjin looked up suddenly, glancing around between them. “Is there food?” 

They nodded. Felix walked him out, the others making room for them to pass. As they left, Felix looked down. The streaks he’d noticed on the floor were blood. There were bloody footprints and smears leading all the way from the keepers’ door. He swallowed the lump in his throat that was threatening to choke him. He suddenly remembered Hyunjin’s face when they brought him in, how he was sobbing and screaming. He had experienced something terrible just before he was brought here.

They walked through the wide cell block and into the courtyard. As Felix had hoped, the table was laid out with food, nine plates now instead of eight. He sat Hyunjin down in the closest seat and he immediately began to eat. The rest sat around him, murmuring quietly to each other. Minho reached under the table, carefully slipping off Hyunjin’s shoes. The standard-issue white slip-ons were nearly completely red. Minho said nothing, just carried them over to the shower area and began washing. 

Hyunjin ate quietly; he was clearly embarrassed but he couldn’t help it. Felix looked around. Everyone stared at Hyunjin with concern. Tears slid down Changbin’s face. Jeongin’s lips were set in a frown, his brow furrowed with concern. Woojin bit his lip, trying to keep from crying. Chan paced behind them, sneaking glances at Hyunjin. His eyes were wide, as though he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. The others poked at their food quietly.

Hyunjin straightened up, wiping his mouth after finishing his plate. Their meals were usually pretty meager: a bowl of rice, some potatoes, a boiled egg and a slice of bread. He’d eaten his in maybe two minutes. All of the others moved at the same time. Changbin slid his rice bowl across the table. Felix and Woojin placed their bread on Hyunjin’s plate. Seungmin slid him his whole tray. Hyunjin blinked in awe, looking around at them. “I can’t take all this from you.” 

Jisung smiled, topping off Hyunjin's glass of water with his own. “We’ve eaten plenty recently. We can spare some.” He slid his bowl of rice over too. 

Hyunjin still looked conflicted, but he leaned down and dug in. The other boys shared what was left, and everyone ended up eating plenty. Felix set some aside for Minho. He came back after a while with Hyunjin’s shoes. They were still stained red, but they looked better. “They’re wet, so you’ll have to let them dry before you put them back on.” 

Hyunjin nodded, wiping his mouth. “Thank you.” Minho smiled at him and sat at the end of the table, taking a bite of his bread. 

Hyunjin sat back, placing his hands in his lap. “I know you all want to know everything. And I’ll tell you, eventually.” He looked down, tracing his finger over the large spot of blood that stained the knee of his slacks. “But I can’t right now. I’m sorry.” 

Everyone nodded. Felix looked around, noting that none of them could make eye contact. Minho chewed silently, staring down at the table. Changbin was fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. Chan had stopped pacing, turning instead to look over at the maze. Hyunjin noticed, turning to Felix. 

“What is that?”

Felix stood, offering a hand to Hyunjin. “That’s the maze. We don’t really know what it’s for, or why it’s here.” They walked over, standing at the entrance. Hyunjin poked his head inside, looking around. 

“What’s at the end of it?” 

Felix sighed, looking over at Chan. “We don’t know. We’ve never gotten very far.” He ran his hand down the wall, tugging on an ivy leaf. “We just know that it’s here, it’s huge, and it’s covered in these fake vines.”

“Fake?” Hyunjin asked, spinning around from where he’d been standing in the entrance. “They’re all fake?”

Felix nodded. “Yeah, can’t you tell?” 

Hyunjin reached out, touching a vine. “None of them are real?” 

Felix shook his head. “No, not that I’ve ever seen.” He tilted his head, wondering why Hyunjin would ask. None of the others ever did. “But I guess we haven’t been very far in. I don’t know why there’d be any real ones, though.” 

Hyunjin muttered something under his breath that Felix couldn’t catch. “What was that?”

Hyunjin shook his head. “Nothing, just thinking.” 

The bell sounded just then. Hyunjin looked to Felix. “What was that?”

“It means we have to go back to our rooms. A second bell will ring right before the door shuts. We should hurry though, there’s usually not much time.” 

Hyunjin nodded, turning to walk with him. He stopped off at the table, picking up his wet shoes. Felix looked down, remembering suddenly that Hyunjin was barefoot. His feet were pale but there were still streaks of blood on the tops of them, more blood between his toes.

Felix cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. “You can probably wash your feet off in the sink in your room, if you want. There’s one washcloth in there, usually.” 

Hyunjin nodded. “Yeah, I uh.” He pressed his lips together tightly, trying not to cry. “I know there’s still blood on my face too.” 

Felix winced. “Yeah.” He wanted to ask, it was eating him up inside, but he knew he shouldn’t. Hyunjin didn’t want to talk about it. They were approaching their rooms, and Felix noticed that some of the blood on the floor had been washed away. The keepers must have slipped out while they were eating and done some cleaning. 

Hyunjin turned, pausing to look at Felix. “I’ll, uh… talk to you more when we get back to our rooms.” He hushed his voice, looking around to make sure no one else was listening. Felix nodded, turning to walk into his own room. As soon as they made it through their respective doors, the bell rang and the doors began to roll closed. He turned back to see Hyunjin standing before the sink, dampening his washcloth. 

Felix sat down on his bed, running a hand through his hair. What the fuck does all this mean? Whose blood is that? He felt unsettled, shaken from the routine he’d gotten so comfortable with. Hyunjin remembered things. Felix was torn between two very strong urges: half of him wanted to know those things, and half of him wanted to go back to his simple life where he didn’t have to worry, where things were easy and boring. He knew one thing for certain: the arrival of this boy meant the end was coming, for better or worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been writing for seven hours please end this suffering


	4. Chapter 4

Felix laid on his bed for a while, staring at the ceiling. Hyunjin finally piped up, poking into his brain like he’d somehow always been there.

_So what is this place, anyway? All these rooms, and that maze?_

Felix shrugged, immediately feeling stupid because Hyunjin couldn’t see that. _None of us really know. We’ve just been in these rooms for a long time. I know there’s a hallway and that the keepers come out of it. That’s about it._

_I guess they were keeping me somewhere back there, then._

Felix thought about it, realizing he’d never really given it much thought. _I suppose we were all back there at some point, for a time. Chan said we all came from there._

_I just realized I was too busy eating to find out everyone’s names._

Felix chuckled a little. _Yeah, that’s true. Well, you met Minho. He was the one who washed your shoes. _

_Yeah, he seems like a very nice person._

Felix smiled to himself. _Yeah, he is. He’s always taking care of us. The one with the bowl cut who can only say his name is Changbin._

_Oh yeah, I was wondering about that. Why can’t he talk?_

_None of us really know. He’s always been that way. It’s just his thing. Each of us has a thing, something that’s wrong with us. We don’t really know why. Anyhow, the one with the chipmunk face and the big round glasses is Jisung. He’s kind of a dumbass, but he’s a good friend. He has some pretty bad night terrors though, and sometimes he just freezes up, like something terrible is happening in his brain._

Hyunjin made a noise of confusion. _Wait, what the fuck is a chipmunk?_

_I mean, I don’t know. I just know he looks like one._

_Fair._

_Moving on, the one with the soft, raspy voice is Woojin. The one who yells everything is Seungmin._

_Any explanations there?_

_Not really. Seungmin is mostly deaf, so he can’t hear anything Woojin says. Jeongin is the one with red hair, he doesn’t say much but he’s really kind. The one who was pacing and didn’t say much is Chan. He’s been here the longest._

_He kept giving me a strange look._

Felix pouted; he’d been curious about that too. _Yeah, I can’t figure out why. He’s normally really friendly._

_How long have you been here?_

_A while. I’m not sure how long, but it seems like it’s been a year at least. We didn’t think there would be anyone else because it had been so long._

Hyunjin paused for a while. _Apparently it took longer with me. I was more…_ He seemed to be searching for the word. _Difficult._

_What took longer? What was it they were doing to you?_

Felix felt something shift, as though an understanding seemed to dawn on Hyunjin. _You don’t know?_

Felix sat up. _No, none of us remember what came before this. What did they do to you?_

He felt something darken. _The same thing they did to all of you. They were erasing my memories._

Felix gripped the mattress, feeling like the world was moving beneath him. A strange feeling washed over him: this was the thought he’d been trying to grasp onto for so long. There _had_ been something before this. He’d tried to force his brain to come to that conclusion, but there had been something blocking it, a fog that wouldn’t lift. Now it felt like part of that fog was gone. It seemed so obvious to him now. 

Hyunjin went on. _They said I had something I wouldn’t let go of. They had to take some…_ Again, a pause. It seemed like he was struggling. _They had to take some more extreme measures with me, apparently._

Felix wrestled with himself, wanting to know but also wanting to shut his brain off, to never talk to Hyunjin again. _Like what?_

_They shocked me a lot. Every day I had to get… treatments, I guess. Someone had to come in and administer them._

_One of the keepers?_

Hyunjin wavered a little. _No, someone else._ Felix gulped, leaning forward, trying to listen. _Felix, I don’t think the others know this, but… we’re not the only ones here._

_There are… other people? Other people who aren’t keepers?_

_Yeah. I don’t know how many. But I had a friend. He told me there were several more._

_A friend? Is that the friend who told you to find me? _

_Yeah. _

Hyunjin didn’t offer anything else, but Felix felt another idea forming in his mind, one that he didn’t want to allow to form completely. Still, it was there. The blood. He stood from his bed, looking out toward the keepers’ door, where there was still some blood smeared on the ground. Was it... his friend's?

He felt his brain go on autopilot, saying something he didn’t really want to say. _Did they hurt your friend?_

There was only silence from the other end, and Felix had the distinct feeling that he’d pushed too far. Finally, Hyunjin answered. _Yes._

Felix looked around. There were only nine rooms. If there was someone else, he wouldn’t be coming here. 

Hyunjin spoke again. _Can the others hear each other? The way that we can hear each other?_

Felix turned around, staring back at his empty room. _Not that I know of. If so, no one’s ever said anything. I’ve never heard any of them. _

_I wonder why we can hear each other then. You’ve only ever heard me?_

Felix took a deep breath, remembering the other night. _I heard a voice the night before you showed up. It was a voice I hadn’t heard before. It wasn’t yours, though. Your voice is deeper._

_What did it say?_

_Just my name, that’s all. I listened for it to come again, but it didn’t._

_Do you think we should tell the others? You know, that we can hear each other in our heads?_

Felix thought about it. Things had been a little tense lately, and he wasn’t sure how some of them would take this news. He already had a sinking feeling that some of them would distrust Hyunjin, seeing as how he’d shown up covered in blood. _I don’t think we should. At least, not at first._

_Okay. I trust you._

_At least not until we figure out why we can hear each other. There has to be a reason, right?_

_Yeah, probably so._

Felix did wonder if any of the others could hear each other, and maybe they’d kept it a secret too. Information like that would surely change the dynamic between them. _Maybe we should tell one person. Test it out, you know? See if anyone else can hear someone._

_Alright. Who should we tell?_

Felix thought about it for a second, trying to decide which member he trusted the most. The answer came to him pretty easily. _I think we should tell Minho. He’s the most mature and he’s not quick to judge. I think he would know what we should do._

_Do you trust him?_

Minho was always the first one to jump into action. He always seemed to know the answers to everyone’s questions, at least about the simple things. Felix knew that some of the others found that suspicious, but for whatever reason, he never did. Minho was always the one he felt like he could turn to. _Yeah, I do. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a lil short boi
> 
> aLsO: I hate fics that write Minho to be evil or a jerk, so none of that here for my best boy. Free Minho 2k19


	5. Chapter 5

The next day, Felix waited by his door for it to open. He rubbed his hands together, hoping they were making the right choice. It could potentially put them in a bad spot if the others found out they were hiding this from them. He really did trust Minho, though.

The doors rolled open and they all filtered out, settling themselves around the table. Felix made sure to get a spot next to Minho. He leaned over, trying to murmur to him without the others noticing. “After you eat, meet Hyunjin and me in the maze.” 

Minho nodded, keeping his eyes focused on his food. Felix glanced over, seeing Hyunjin slip into the shower. He’d said he really needed to wash off, excited at the idea of some warm water. 

Felix ate quickly, glancing around the table. The others were eating and talking, laughing at Changbin’s puffy-cheeked impression of Jisung. Jisung scowled, a blush on his cheeks. 

Hyunjin joined them after a while, rubbing his hair dry with a towel until it stuck up in every direction before digging into his food. Jeongin giggled, messing up his hair to match Hyunjin’s. It made Felix smile. 

Once he’d finished eating, Felix stood, walking around to tap Hyunjin on the shoulder. “Hey, want me to show you around the maze a little?” 

Hyunjin nodded, wiping his mouth and standing up. Minho stood too. “Hey I’ll join you guys, it’s been a while since I’ve been in there.”

They made their way over, Minho chattering to Hyunjin as they walked through the entrance. Felix looked back over his shoulder; the others were still talking and eating. No one was following them. 

Once they were inside, Felix ducked around a corner, and then another, turning back to make sure the other two were still behind him. He rounded a third corner and then a fourth, finally coming to a small dead end, far enough away from the others that they couldn’t hear. Minho limped up behind them.

“So what’s this about?”

Felix took a deep breath, looking to Hyunjin before he spoke. “We needed to ask you something, and we didn’t want the others to hear.” 

Minho nodded, looking between them. “Alright, go for it.” 

“This is going to sound pretty weird.” 

Minho shrugged. “What part of our existence isn’t weird, Felix?”

He nodded. “Okay yeah, you got me there.” 

Hyunjin spoke up. “Can any of the others… hear each other?”

Minho scrunched his nose up, processing. He grinned. “Well, I mean, Seungmin can’t hear _anybody._”

Felix rolled his eyes. “No, he means,” He leaned in, lowering his voice. “Can any of the others hear each other, in their heads?” 

Minho tilted his head. “Like, telepathically?”

Felix groaned. “What? I mean, I don’t know what that means, but yeah. Like, hearing someone else’s voice inside your head.”

Minho looked back over his shoulder, in the direction of the others. “No, not that I know of.” He turned back to them. “At least, no one’s ever said anything of the sort. And I’ve never heard any of their voices in my head.” He looked between the two of them for a moment. “But I’m guessing you two can, and that’s why you’re here asking me.”

Felix looked at Hyunjin. _I told you, he’s good._

Hyunjin turned to Minho. “Somehow, Felix and I can communicate with each other. We weren’t sure if anyone else could do the same thing, and likewise, we weren’t sure if we should tell anyone that we can.” 

Minho nodded. “I can understand that. Why tell me, then?”

Felix shrugged. “Because I trust you, and I figured you’d know what to do.”

Minho smiled. “Thanks, Felix.” He thought for a moment, looking at the two of them. “I wouldn’t tell anyone. Not yet, anyway. Not until you figure out how or why you’re able to do it. How long have you heard each other?”

“Since the first night he was here. He was calling my name and I don’t know how, but I heard it. I found out that I could respond, and we’ve just been talking since.” 

Hyunjin wrung his hands, thinking for a second before speaking up. “There’s something else, too.” 

Minho grinned again. “Something as big as the fact that you two can communicate telepathically?”

“Maybe, yeah. I… remember things. From before I got put in the cell.”

Minho’s jaw dropped. “You do? What do you remember?”

“I was in a room, and the floor would shock me unless I did what they wanted. They made me sit in a chair sometimes, and someone would come in and shock my brain. They were trying to erase my memories. I know that I had memories for a long time, but I can’t remember what they are exactly. I remember them hurting me, and starving me. I know I fought with them a lot.”

Minho blinked, trying to take it all in. “That’s… huge.”

Hyunjin nodded. “Felix told me that no one else remembers anything. I don’t know if I want them to know.” He looked down at his bloodstained slacks. “I’m afraid they already think I’m suspicious. Between that, and me hearing Felix, I’m afraid of what would happen if they found out.” 

Minho nodded. “Yeah, I can understand that. I don’t think anyone would turn on you, but I guess I don’t really know that much about anyone else here. I think it’s alright to keep that quiet for now. But you two also need to be careful.” 

Felix looked up. “What do you mean?”

“Hyunjin’s only been here for a day. If the others notice how close you two are, they’re going to start wondering how you’ve gotten to know each other. You need to be careful to not give anything away.”

They both nodded. He had a point. Felix shrugged. “I guess we should be heading back soon.”

Minho nodded and turned back the way they came. Hyunjin reached out suddenly, grabbing Minho’s sleeve. He turned back.

“You said something a moment ago, and I feel like there’s more to it than what you’ve told us.”

Minho stopped, his hands in his pockets. “Yeah?”

“You said you’d never heard any of the others’ voices in your head. Does that mean you’ve heard another voice? One that wasn’t theirs?”

Minho shrugged, a grin spreading across his face. “Damn, you’re sharper than I took you for.”

Hyunjin grinned too. “Out with it.”

Minho nodded. “I heard a voice, only once though. I didn’t want to alarm you guys. It wasn’t any of us, I know, and at first I was wondering if it was you, until I heard you speak yesterday.” He shrugged. “It hasn’t happened since, so I was sort of thinking I dreamed it. Until now, that is.”

Felix caught his gaze. “I also heard a voice that wasn’t any of ours.” 

Minho’s eyes widened. “When?”

“The night before we met Hyunjin. The night I had all those bad dreams, and you had to come wake me.”

Minho gasped a little. “That was the same night I heard it too.”

Felix leaned forward. “What did it say?”

Minho looked down at his feet. “I don’t remember all of it. Something about not forgetting. It said something bad was going to happen, and I shouldn’t forget something. I dunno, it was kind of vague.” 

Felix nodded. “It only said my name, I thought it was a dream too at first.” 

Hyunjin hugged his arms around himself. “I haven’t heard it. I wonder if the others have, but it’s not like we could ask.” 

They all nodded, turning to head back. Minho walked a little slower because of his limp, and Hyunjin and Felix began to chatter about another subject as they came back into earshot of the others. 

He bit his lip, looking at the two of them. Minho really hated lying.

He remembered every single word the voice had said. Those words would be imprinted on his brain as long as he was alive. 

\---------------------------

The night before Hyunjin had arrived, Minho had jolted awake, feeling a strange buzzing in his head. It was still night, his night light shining from the end of his bed. Something had woken him, but he couldn’t figure out what. He sat up, rubbing his eyes. 

_Minho._

A voice came out of nowhere. He looked around his room, but nothing was amiss. It was a small voice, and at first he wasn’t even sure he heard it for real. 

_Minho, I know this must be confusing, but just listen._ He dropped his hands to his lap, trying to concentrate on the voice. It wasn’t a voice that he’d ever heard before, certainly not one of his friends. It was a higher pitch, a soft tone. He couldn’t place it, but it somehow felt familiar. 

_I have to tell you this now, it’s probably my last chance. They’re onto me, and I don’t know how much longer I’ve got. I think things are about to go south, for all of you. I tried my best to save you all, but I don’t know if it’s going to work._

Minho felt tears spilling down his cheeks, and he didn’t know why. Maybe it was the desperation in the voice. 

_I know you don’t remember me. That’s not your fault. They tried to make me forget you, but I can’t. I won’t. I kept hoping I’d get to see you again, but I know now that I probably never will. If you ever get your memories back, please know that. Please know I never forgot you. I never forgot how we felt, and what we went through. Part of me hopes you won’t remember, because it will be so much easier that way. Take care of each other. Take care of Hyunjin._

Minho furrowed his brow. He’d never heard that name, but the voice went on.

_And if you ever remember me, please don’t forget how much I love you. _

The voice went silent.


	6. Chapter 6

A few weeks passed by without incident. Hyunjin settled in, getting to know the others. Felix didn’t ask any more questions about what had befallen Hyunjin before he came here, and part of him figured that was for the best. Maybe things could just be okay now. He had a friend to talk to, a reason for waking up in the morning. Minho eventually did introduce him to everyone, and Hyunjin was blending in nicely. Within a few weeks, it was almost like he’d been there all along.

Still, though, sometimes Felix found himself staring at the large bloodstain on Hyunjin’s knee. They were only given one set of clothes, and no amount of scrubbing or washing was going to get the dark red out of the white fabric. Something in his brain kept reminding him that he didn’t want to know. Knowing was dangerous. 

Chan continued to stare at Hyunjin, though, when he thought no one else was looking. He’d been quieter lately, chewing his food in silence and reviewing the small piece of paper he’d been keeping in his breast pocket. Most of them weren’t given paper, but Chan had some from when he first moved in. Perks of being the first, perhaps. Sometimes he’d disappear into the maze, coming out with more of it mapped. Felix wondered how long until the page would be full, with no more room to write anything out. Surely the maze went on for a very long time. 

One day at lunch, Hyunjin set down his fork, his eyes focused on the maze entrance. Without saying anything, he stood and walked toward it. Felix wiped his mouth and moved to join him. 

Hyunjin had turned several corners before Felix caught up to him. “What’s the matter?”

Hyunjin was looking around, glancing at every wall. “I just remembered something.”

Felix tilted his head. “Like what?”

“Remember my first day? I asked if all the plants were fake?”

Felix nodded, it had been a strange thing to say. “Yeah, I remember. What about it?”

Hyunjin tugged at his collar, still glancing around at the walls. “I have some weird feeling that something in here is real.”

“Real?”

Hyunjin nodded. “Yeah, like maybe one of these vines is real.”

Felix looked around too, taking in the dark green vines. “Why would you think so? I mean, this maze goes on a long way, and from what we can see, every inch of it looks the same.”

Hyunjin shrugged, looking down now. “I don’t know. Something my friend told me.”

“Your friend? The one from before?”

Hyunjin nodded. “Yeah. It’s probably nothing. I mean, it looks like everything is the same anyway.”

Felix looked back at Hyunjin. “Was it something about the maze?”

Hyunjin shook his head. “No, not specifically. It might have been about something else.”

Felix opened his mouth to ask another question, when he saw someone turn the corner, a little further away from them. It was Chan.

Chan stopped, looking them over. “What are you guys doing in here?”

Hyunjin shrugged. “I was just curious, I’ve never been very far in here. I just wanted to look around some.” 

Felix smiled, nodding. “Yeah I didn’t want him to go alone, it’s easy to get lost.”

Chan furrowed his brow, looking at them strangely. “Yeah, you probably shouldn’t go too far. Felix, you remember what happened to Woojin.”

Felix hung his head as Chan walked past him toward the exit. “You’re right, Chris. I’m sorry. I guess I wasn’t really thinking.”

Chan stiffened, stopping in his tracks. “What was that?” He spun around to look at Felix.

Felix looked up at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

Chan walked closer, examining Felix’s face. “You called me Chris. Why did you call me that?”

Felix tilted his head, confused. “Chris? I did? I didn’t mean to.” 

Chan tilted his head, his gaze still boring into Felix. “Where did you hear that?”

Felix shrugged, wringing his hands. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard it, my mouth just kind of said it. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to call you a different name.”

Chan’s shoulders deflated a little, his face smoothing out. “It’s alright. Just kinda weird.” 

Felix nodded. “Sometimes I wonder if I really have control of my brain at all.” 

Chan nodded too. “Yeah, I wonder that about myself. Anyway, we should head back. The bell will be ringing soon.” He turned to walk back toward the others. Felix and Hyunjin followed.

Hyunjin spoke up in Felix’s head. _Whoa, what just happened?_

Felix rubbed his temples. _I don’t know. I’ve never heard that word before. It just slipped out._

Hyunjin reached out, rubbing his hand between Felix’s shoulder blades. Felix leaned into the touch a little, enjoying the firmness of Hyunjin’s wide hand. It was comforting. 

_Do you think he heard us talking?_

Felix looked at Hyunjin. _Oh shit, I don’t know. I hope not._

Hyunjin nodded. _Yeah hopefully not. From now on, we should probably just talk like this so no one will hear us._

Felix agreed, looking forward at Chan’s broad shoulders as he led them out into the courtyard. He remembered Minho’s warning, to be careful. He’d gotten too comfortable.

They were almost over to where the others were sitting when Chan dropped. He hit the floor hard, Felix and Hyunjin almost tripping over his legs. Felix gasped, kneeling down as Chan started to convulse. “Guys!” 

He heard footsteps running over, Minho reaching them first. “Roll him on his side!” 

Felix and Hyunjin pushed Chan over so he wasn’t face down, resting him on his shoulder instead. Minho kneeled down, pulling Chan’s head into his lap. The others knelt around them, worried. Felix looked up and noticed the panic on Hyunjin’s face. 

Jeongin noticed as well, leaning over to touch Hyunjin’s shoulder. “It’s alright, this happens sometimes. In a few minutes, he’ll be okay.” 

Hyunjin nodded, unable to look away. It seemed to go on forever, the only sounds were Chan’s wheezing and the thrashing of his feet. Suddenly, he relaxed and the room was silent.

Minho stroked his hair. “It’s alright, Chan. You’re okay.” Felix rubbed Chan’s shoulder. No matter how many times he saw this, it still scared him every time. 

Chan caught his breath finally, limp with exhaustion. Everyone sat back, still circled around. Hyunjin’s eyes were wide with fear. Jisung spoke up, turning to Hyunjin.

“Each one of us is a little broken. I know you’ve noticed some of it.” He gestured around the circle as he explained. “I know you’ve seen Minho’s limp. Woojin can barely speak. Changbin, well, you know.” Hyunjin nodded, looking around at each of them. They looked back at him, solemn. “Felix has a hard time staying focused sometimes, he seems to drift off and he has trouble getting his words out. Seungmin can’t hear, most of the time.” Seungmin looked up, nodding. He’d gotten pretty decent at reading lips. 

Jisung gestured to Jeongin. “Jeongin is blind in one eye.” Hyunjin looked at him, flicking back and forth between his eyes. Jeongin reached up, pointing at the right one. 

Jisung went on. “Mine is kind of hard to describe. I don’t remember it, but the guys say that sometimes I black out and I can’t hear or see anything. They try to talk to me, but it’s like the lights are on and nobody’s home. And Chan, well,” he gestured to their present situation. “Chan has seizures. We all have something.” 

Hyunjin nodded, trying to take it all in. He looked around at each of them. His eyes landed on Woojin, who was looking at him intently.

“What’s yours, Hyunjin?” he whispered, reaching up to cradle his throat. Everyone in the circle turned to look at him. 

Hyunjin swallowed thickly. Woojin continued to stare him down. “Or is that just another thing about yourself that you can’t explain?”

Felix felt his hackles rise up, about to jump to Hyunjin’s defense. Minho turned to look at him, a warning on his face.

Hyunjin nodded. “I get what you’re saying. I understand there’s a lot I haven’t told you. And I’m not sure if this is my… thing, but,” he trailed off as he reached down, unbuttoning his shirt. 

The others watched him, confused. As he reached the bottom button, he pulled his shirt open to expose his stomach. 

Felix felt his ears buzz with shock as he took in what was before him. The others gasped. Hyunjin’s stomach was riddled with scar tissue, a large, deep gash marring the skin right in the middle. Part of the scar extended up onto his chest, and more of it seemed to wrap around his sides. It looked like a firework had gone off in his skin. Felix was mesmerized and also chilled to his core. It looked like he’d nearly been cut in half and sewn back together. 

“It doesn’t hurt, and it seems like it’s fully healed, whatever it is. But I’m guessing that something happened to me before I was here.” He looked up. “I’d imagine it’s the same for you guys.” 

Everyone was speechless as the bell sounded. Minho flinched, surprised by the sound. The others moved slowly to get up, and Felix turned to look at Chan. He’d lifted his head up and was staring wide-eyed at Hyunjin, like he’d seen a ghost. The same way he’d looked at him on the first day. None of them spoke as Hyunjin buttoned his shirt back, standing up as Minho helped Chan up off the ground. They walked quietly to their rooms, and Felix collapsed on his bed as the second bell sounded. 

What the fuck was that? What had happened to him? And frankly, what had happened to all of them? Felix had never really thought much about it. It made sense that something had happened outside of here that had caused everyone to have some sort of injury, but Hyunjin had seemed to come to that conclusion on his own. Felix was terrified of the thought that was forming in his mind: could he really trust Hyunjin? He still didn’t know the whole truth, about the blood and Hyunjin’s friend, about the treatments he was given. What if there was something else Hyunjin wasn’t telling him? 

He rolled over, staring at the wall until the lights flicked off some time later. His mind was quiet; neither of them spoke. In the darkness, he heard a muffled voice come from the other side of the wall. “Bin bin?”

Felix squeezed his eyes closed, leaning closer to the wall. “Yeah, Changbinnie. Bin bin.” 

He fell asleep to the soft sounds of Changbin’s tears, his shuddering sobs barely audible through the wall between them.


	7. Chapter 7

Felix kept to himself more over the coming days. A month or so had passed by since the day Chan had his seizure, and they hadn’t talked much about what had happened. He still talked to Hyunjin regularly, but questions were growing in his mind. He could tell that some of the others were wondering the same things, giving Hyunjin a strange look when he wasn’t paying attention. Hyunjin still looked around in the maze from time to time, offering Felix no explanation.

Really, Felix didn’t want to know. It was easier this way. He could wake up, eat some food, laugh and joke around with his friends, and then go back to his room and sleep. That was all he really needed, and he was content to let it stay that way. Thinking about what came before was too difficult; it filled him with an uneasy dread that made him uncomfortable. 

A few of the others seemed restless though, Hyunjin included. Minho seemed impatient, always looking for something. It made Felix nervous. Chan continued to map the maze, alone. 

Felix had laid down that night determined to talk to Chan the next day. What was he looking for, exactly? Was there a reason he was so insistent now to map it out? He hadn’t really cared a whole lot before. He blinked awake as the lights flicked on, feeling more tired than usual. It was like he’d only been asleep for a few hours. He heard a sound then that shook him, causing him to sit up in a panic. It was his door, rolling open. 

He stood and walked out, looking around at the others. Jeongin came out rubbing his eyes, his hair messed up from sleep. Chan came out of his door, looking around in confusion. Jisung ran out, putting on his glasses. “What’s going on?”

They all gathered in a circle in the corridor between the rooms, looking around. This had never happened before. They’d never been woken by the doors. 

Minho rubbed the back of his neck. “It feels like I just went to sleep, like it’s not morning yet.”

Seungmin nodded, “I COULDN’T SLEEP, SO I WAS JUST LAYING THERE. THE LIGHTS ONLY WENT OFF A COUPLE HOURS AGO.”

Felix looked around at all of them, and back toward the keepers’ door. He saw something unusual, and walked closer.

The door was the same kind of door that was on their cells, a large metal door with a small window. The window looked out into a plain, white hallway, with open doors on either side. Sometimes he’d seen keepers milling around between them, shuffling paperwork from room to room. Now, though, the hallway was lit with an eerie red light. At the end of the hall, he could see a blinking white light on the ceiling. From behind the door, he could hear the blaring of an alarm. 

Felix motioned everyone over, and they took turns looking through the window. The keepers were nowhere to be seen. A pile of papers was strewn over the floor about halfway down the hallway, and the plant sitting in the corner at the far end had been tipped over. 

Minho grimaced as he looked through the window. “It looks like they left in a hurry.”

Jeongin nodded. “But why did our doors open then?”

Minho shrugged. “I have no idea. But I have a bad feeling about what this means.”

Jisung ran a hand nervously through his hair. “It means the keepers are gone, right? We don’t have to worry about them anymore.”

Changbin nodded too. “Bin bin!” he pointed in the direction of the courtyard. “Binnie! Changbinnie.”

They remembered then that there was a second door in the yard, close to the picnic table. They assumed that’s where the keepers brought in the food. They all took off running, down the hallway and past the table, circling around the door there. 

It was a similar scene: red lights, a muffled alarm, a blinking white light flooding the room repeatedly. Whenever the white light blinked, they could see something streaked on the wall. It seemed to be blood. There had been a struggle here. 

“What is going on?” Felix muttered. “What does all of this mean?”

Chan was pacing behind them. “It means there will be no more food.” 

The others spun around, looking at him.

“They bring us food every day, right? They’re gone. It’s the middle of the night. It looks like there was a fight. We’re not going to be given any more food.” 

They stood around in silence, looking at each other. Chan was right. If the keepers were gone, so was their food. 

Jisung stepped forward. “So what, they’re just leaving us to starve in here?”

Woojin scoffed. “What, you think they ever cared for us in the first place?”

Minho shook his head. “No, someone opened our doors. If they wanted us to die, they would have just left us in there.” 

Felix nodded, that would have made more sense if they’d just wanted them to starve. 

Jeongin walked up, tugging as hard as he could on the handle of the door. It didn’t budge. They looked behind them, at the picnic table. They had run out of seats a while back and the keepers had added a chair at each end of the table. Chan picked up a chair, bringing it over. He swung it as hard as he could at the window, trying to drive one of the chair legs through it. It bounced off with a hollow thud. He tried again, putting all his weight into it. He tried over and over, sweat pouring over his forehead. Finally Minho yanked him away from the door.

“Stop! You’re going to wear yourself out. We need to try something else.” 

Chan threw the chair down with a bang. “Well what do you suggest then, Minho? You always act like you know what’s going on, but you’re just as lost as the rest of us.” He stalked away, walking over to sit on the table’s bench.

Minho sneered. “Maybe I don’t know any better, but I know getting upset and panicking isn’t going to get us out any faster.” 

Chan scoffed. “I’m the only one who’s been trying to get us out of here! I’ve been going through this goddamn maze every day, while you all just accept it. I’ve been trying.”

Woojin rolled his eyes. “Yeah and how far has that gotten you, Chan? You know what’s further in the maze? More maze. It just keeps going. I ran as far as I could that day, and it just kept going on. There’s nothing in there.” 

Felix jumped at the sound of Chan’s fists hitting the table. “Then why is it here? Why is there a fucking maze in this place if it doesn’t mean anything?”

“There’s a way out.” 

Everyone fell silent, looking up. Chan lifted his head, his eyebrows furrowed. 

Hyunjin cleared his throat, speaking again. “There’s a way out.” 

Chan stood, approaching him. He clenched and unclenched his fists. “And how do you know that?”

Hyunjin was shivering, his eyes full of tears. “Someone told me.”

Chan scoffed again. “And why the fuck should we believe you?” Hyunjin shook his head, looking down. 

Chan gestured to his pants. “You show up here like this with no explanation. You say you remember what happened but you won’t tell us. And you expect us to just believe you now?”

Hyunjin shrugged his shoulders. “I know, you have no reason to believe me.”

Chan jolted forward, grabbing Hyunjin by his shirt and slamming him against the wall behind him. “You’re not telling us everything!” 

Felix felt his feet move before his brain caught up. He lunged forward, but he was stopped suddenly by Minho’s shoulder, his arms around his waist. “No Felix, don’t do this. Don’t make this worse.” He struggled against Minho’s hold, but to no avail.

The others stood around, shocked into silence. Chan shook Hyunjin again. “So why don’t you tell us, huh? You’ve told Felix. I heard you talking in the maze about your ‘friend.’ So why don’t you tell all of us?”

Felix grit his teeth. So Chan _had_ heard. And he’d feigned innocence. 

Hyunjin shoved Chan away, straightening his shirt. “I haven’t told Felix anything. All he knows is that....” he looked around at the others staring at him, swallowing heavily. “I told him that I remember stuff from before I was put in my cell. I remember everything from the time I got here.” 

The others gasped. Chan dropped his arms, speechless. Hyunjin rolled his shoulders. “I’ll tell you everything. But once you know, there’s no forgetting. So don’t blame me if you hear things you wish you’d never heard.” 

Chan motioned toward the table, and they all gathered around it. Seungmin picked up the chair that Chan had tossed, setting it at the end. Hyunjin sat at the head of the table, the others taking their places and focusing on him. Chan sat at the other end of the table, staring down at him. “Strange things have been happening ever since you showed up, Hyunjin. There’s been little things, inconsistencies. Felix calling me the wrong name. Minho acting like he knows something he won’t tell us.” Minho looked up, glaring at Chan. “And now this.” He raised his hands, gesturing toward the door. “I’m not blaming you, but you’ve got to agree that something is going on.” 

Hyunjin nodded. “I think what happened before I came here, it changed things.”

Chan leaned forward. “So then tell us. Everything.” 

Hyunjin took a deep breath in, shaking. He looked to Felix. _I’m sorry._

Felix nodded. _It’s okay._

He closed his eyes, and began to speak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yooooo things are about to get wild let's go
> 
> Sorry for the long break in between, I've been travelling every weekend but the next chapter is written already, so I just have to proofread and it should be up soon. Get ready for some more characters, I've got a lot planned. Stick with me! I love you guys <3


	8. Chapter 8

Hyunjin blinked awake, his head lolled back and resting on something solid. A bright light shined above him, buzzing loudly. He was disoriented, and there was a deep pain in his middle. He lifted his head carefully, the world spinning as he did so. He tried to lift his hand to rub his eyes, but he found it wouldn’t move. He tugged it, blinking his eyes down only to see his hand held down with a thick metal latch. It was attached to the arm of the chair he sat in. He looked toward his other hand, finding it to be tied down the same way. He tried to move his feet, but it was the same for them too.

He looked around. The floor was metal, a thin grate with a criss-crossing hatched pattern. He couldn’t see anything below it. The walls were white cinderblocks. He looked forward, in front of him. There was a large black rectangle in the wall, like a window. It was somewhat transparent, and he could see the outlines of figures moving behind it. They just looked like shadows to him, though. 

He tugged against the restraints, grimacing as he did so. His stomach hurt badly; it felt like he’d had a knife driven through him. He looked up at the figures behind the window, feeling anger lick at his brain. He tugged harder. 

He heard a buzzing sound come from above the dark window, and he looked up to see a speaker there. One of the figures behind the window stopped moving, standing right in the center and seemingly looking in on him. 

“So, I see you’re awake.” A deep voice came over the speaker, echoing off the walls around him. “You’ve caused me a lot of trouble, you know that?”

Hyunjin struggled again, kicking his legs against the chair. It still wouldn’t budge.

“You and your friends. You’ve all become a real headache for me.” 

Hyunjin continued to struggle against his bonds. In the moment, the anger threatened to consume him whole. Recounting this tale now though, sitting around the table in the courtyard, he couldn’t remember why he was so angry. That was a memory that had been erased.

He’d shouted out. “Fuck you! Where are they? What have you done with them?”

The man behind the window chuckled. “Oh don’t worry. They’re getting exactly what they deserve.” The man stopped speaking, but the speaker remained on. Hyunjin listened closely. There was a small sound coming from somewhere far away, but as he focused on it, it became clear. Someone was screaming, distressed and in pain. When one scream faded away, another would begin, closer this time. As he listened, he heard screams over and over, different voices. Hyunjin shook his head violently.

“Stop! Leave them alone!”

The man chuckled again. “You should have thought of that before you decided to do what you’ve done.” The speaker clicked off and Hyunjin felt a shooting pain, wracking his nerves and jolting through his body. Sparks licked off the floor, a loud buzzing filling his head to the point where he thought he would explode. 

He shook his head again. He must have blacked out, because the man behind the window was gone. There was no movement now. He looked down at his hands again, jumping in his seat when he realized the latches had fallen open. He leaped up, wobbling a bit as he stood on his feet. He ran to the door, a large white metal door just to the left of the window. He tugged on the handle, but it didn’t move. He moved to the window, pressing his hands up against it. He cupped his palms around his eyes, leaning close to the glass and finding he could see through it. There was an empty hallway beyond, and some sort of control panel on the other side of the glass. 

He stepped back, looking desperately for another exit. The ceiling was too high for him to reach, even standing on the chair. He noticed now that the chair was fully metal, and that’s probably how they shocked him. The floor must be electrified. There was the chair, and a toilet in the far corner of the room. There was nothing else. 

Hyunjin felt overwhelmed. He sat in the corner, leaning his back against the wall. His torso was killing him. He unbuttoned his shirt, trying to take a look. A large, angry scar cut across his midsection. The muscles beneath felt painful, wrong. It looked as though he’d been haphazardly stitched back together. Even back then, he had no recollection of where the wound had come from. It was a gaping hole in both his body and his mind. 

The lights clicked off after a while, leaving him swimming in the room’s darkness. He dropped his head back against the wall. The window looked different now that his room was dark and the hallway was light. It was almost transparent now. He could see the shapes beyond more clearly, even though they were still darkened and gray. People walked past, not paying any mind to his room. None of them looked to be the man from before. 

Some time passed and he felt his eyes slipping closed, even though he’d resigned himself to watching for movement outside the window. Finally a figure came into view, stopping in the middle of the window and looking in. This person was shorter, not the man from before. The person walked close to the window, possibly peering in. Hyunjin had realized at some point that it was most likely a two-way mirror, that they could see him and he couldn’t see them. He wasn’t sure if the person could see him in here now, huddled in the back corner in the dark. They walked away after a while, and Hyunjin was alone again.

The next morning, the lights clicked back on. Hyunjin felt bleary, lost. He blinked, rubbing his hands against his eyes. He stood and relieved himself, hiding behind the small metal wall that blocked the toilet from the window. As he finished, he heard the speaker click on again. 

“Hurry up and get in the chair,” the voice demanded. It wasn’t the man from before, it was someone else. A short, pudgy figure was standing before the window. “Don’t make me ask twice.” 

Hyunjin finished and buttoned his pants back, glaring in the window’s direction. He stood in the middle of the floor, unmoving. He flipped his middle finger toward the figure. He regretted it immediately as a wave of electricity rooted him to the spot, shooting up from his feet. The soles of his shoes seemed to do nothing to dampen the volts. 

The electricity stopped after a moment, and the speaker came on again. The man sighed. “Come on, just sit. Don’t make me do that again.” 

Hyunjin ran his hand through his hair, loosening the static energy that had gathered there. He made his way to the chair, glaring at the figure the whole way. He sat, his hands in his lap.

The man sighed again. “Put your hands in the latches. Your feet too. Go on.”

Hyunjin grimaced, doing as he was asked. The metal latches whirred, slowly coming together to clip around his wrists. The same thing happened around his ankles. 

The door opened then, the pudgy man wheeling in a large cart. It was full of some kind of machinery, screens displaying various information and lots of dials and knobs. The man wheeled it behind Hyunjin. He left the room again, coming back with another, smaller cart. This one had a tray lined with paper, and in it were several round electrodes with wires attached. He wheeled that beside Hyunjin, moving to attach the wires to the machine behind him. Hyunjin got a good look at the man. He was wearing light blue scrubs, and his face seemed tired. He was unfamiliar, even at that time Hyunjin knew he had never seen him before. He seemed sad. 

“Just let it happen,” the man murmured. “It’ll be easier for you if you do.”

Hyunjin whispered to him. “What is this? What are you doing to me?”

The man shook his head. “Just do what they tell you. It’ll be better if you forget it all.”

At the time, Hyunjin had scoffed. How could he possibly forget? His treasured memories and the events of the last few months, the memory of someone who was very special. He would hold those close to him forever, no matter what. That’s what he’d thought then. But now, here in the courtyard, he couldn’t remember what he’d forgotten. He only remembered the way he’d felt about it, his determination.

The man walked out, closing the door behind him. Hyunjin sat in silence for a while, looking over at the tray beside him. There were several implements: round rubbery electrodes, scalpels, needles, vials full of liquid. He felt his stomach turn. He saw movement in front of the window, and he looked up. The tall man from before was back. Hyunjin could make out his shadow standing there, arms crossed. A few more people walked by, seemingly pushing another person. The tall man waved, pointing at the door. He heard it unlock and swing open, and he could see several more blue-clad men struggling with something. Someone, rather. After a moment they shoved someone into Hyunjin’s room, the person falling onto hands and knees. The door swung shut as the person stood, their body slamming into the metal. They jiggled the handle, trying to yank it open. 

Hyunjin heard them sigh as the door remained closed. They were wearing gray clothes, unlike the blue of the attendants and the white of his own clothes. The person turned around, looking at Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin’s brain felt scrambled then. He almost recognized him, but not quite. It was a boy, with large brown eyes and long, shoulder-length blond hair. He seemed to be Hyunjin’s age, maybe older. He’d seen him somewhere before, but he couldn’t place it. It was on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn’t figure it out. It felt like another hole in his brain, a gap in his memory. The first of many, he would come to find out. 

The boy rested against the door, looking at Hyunjin with a bleak expression. “You don’t know who I am, do you?”

Hyunjin swallowed. “No, not really. I think I’ve seen you before, but I don’t know where.”

The boy hung his head. “I figured as much.” 

The speaker clicked on. “Get on with it.”

The boy turned, looking at the window. He grimaced. “Why are you making me do this?” he asked in the direction of the tall man.

“You know why.” 

The boy ran a hand through his hair. Hyunjin could see he was shaking. He walked around to the tray beside the chair, standing there motionless. The tall man sighed through the speaker. Another jolt of electricity shocked them both, the boy seizing up in front of Hyunjin. It only lasted a moment, but they were both out of breath when it let up. 

“Do it or I’ll kill the both of you.” 

The boy locked eyes with Hyunjin. He seemed to be about to cry. He reached down, picking up one of the nodes and applying some gel to the back. He stuck it to Hyunjin’s temple. He pressed it down firmly, his long fingers cold against Hyunjin’s skin. He repeated the action with a second node, pressing it to the other side. Two more went on the back of Hyunjin’s neck, and two more on his forehead. The boy sighed, walking around to the machine behind him.

The tall man crossed his arms again, watching. “Start with 5.” 

Hyunjin heard the boy gasp. “That’s…”

The tall man interjected. “Do it. Now.” 

Hyunjin heard the machine turn on, whirring behind him. The tall man leaned closer to the window. Hyunjin could almost make out his face.

He heard a click, the machine kicking up a notch. The boy behind him whispered. 

“I’m so sorry, Hyunjin.”

A button was pressed and Hyunjin felt his head fly back against the seat. A shockwave racked through him, different than the shock from the floor. It felt like it was going to melt his brain, boil him alive. He felt his jaw slam shut, his teeth gnashing together. He tried to scream, but it just came out as a strangled noise. His vision wavered before going out completely. He prayed for death, for unconsciousness, something, but none came. It might have been a minute or an hour, but he was sure he was going to die before it ended. Finally the machine clicked off and the electricity was gone, but Hyunjin still couldn’t move. His jaw was locked, his eyes wide open and pouring tears. He was still screaming, muffled sounds coming out from between his clenched teeth. His vision slowly came back, like he was swimming to the surface of a pool of black water. 

The boy walked around, leaning over Hyunjin as he took the electrodes off. Tears were running down his face too. He peeled the nodes off one by one, reaching around Hyunjin’s stiff neck to take the ones off the back. Before he got the final one, he cupped his hand around the back of Hyunjin’s head. He whispered to him, close to his ear. “Please, forgive me.” He pulled the last one off, setting it on the tray. The man came over the speaker again.

“Good. Walk to the door.” 

The boy wrung his hands, walking out of Hyunjin’s view. 

Hyunjin couldn’t see it, but the boy turned back one last time, looking over his shoulder at the tortured body of his friend. He wouldn’t sleep for days.

\----------------

Hyunjin must have blacked out, because he woke up on the floor, so stiff he could barely move. There was a throbbing pain in his brain, just behind his right ear. Once he finally got the feeling back in his arms, he reached up. There was a long, painful incision behind his ear. His brain throbbed, pain resonating through every part of his body. He pulled his fingers back, seeing blood dripping down his fingertip. The pain reached a fever pitch, and he was back out again.

\--------------

Days had gone by. Hyunjin had been in and out of consciousness, laying on the floor alone. When he finally woke fully, he noticed there was something on the floor of his room. It was a plastic tray with three plain crackers on it. He scooted over as quickly as he could, shoving them in his mouth. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was until just now. He turned around and noticed the wheeled carts were gone.

He finished chewing and walked over to the toilet, surprised at how little was in his bladder after all that time. He realized with a start that he hadn’t drank anything since he’d been here. His lips were so dry they’d cracked and started to bleed. He finished and washed his hands in the small sink that was above the toilet. He leaned down, drinking the water that came out of the faucet. It tasted clean enough, but at that point, he didn’t care even if it was dirty. He was so thirsty.

He drank for a long time, finally feeling a little better. He was still ravenously hungry, but he had a sinking feeling that he wouldn’t see any more food for a while. While he was drinking, someone had slipped in and taken the tray back. He walked over to the other corner, sitting down. 

His head still hurt a tremendous amount. He felt dizzy and disoriented. He sat there for a while, trying to ground himself. 

The tall man appeared before the window again. Hyunjin felt his stomach drop. The speaker clicked on.

“Had enough yet?”

Hyunjin shook his head, grimacing. The man chuckled.

“The sooner you forget everything, the sooner you get out of here.” 

Hyunjin felt the anger boiling up in him again. “I’ll never forget.”

The tall man barked out a laugh. “You’ve already forgotten.”

Hyunjin tilted his head, staring at the man’s shadow. “I still remember everything.” 

“You’ve forgotten one of your dearest friends, haven’t you? The first treatment we did when you got here seemed to take care of that. It’s unfortunate actually, I was hoping you’d remember him while he fried your brain. I guess this emotional torture is more for him now than it is for you.” 

Hyunjin remembered the boy from before. They’d been friends?

How could he have forgotten?

Maybe the man was lying. But no, the boy had known Hyunjin’s name. They had known each other, after all. 

“Anyway, you’re becoming a difficult case. Some of the others let go of their memories right away. But not you. You’re holding onto something. You’re just making it that much more difficult for yourself.”

The speaker clicked off and the man walked away. Hyunjin stared at the floor. He started to repeat things in his head: names, faces, events. He refused to forget. If it was possible for him forget one person, he might forget them all. He might forget someone very important. 

Of course, present-day Hyunjin knew now that it was possible. He had forgotten. He could no longer recall their names, their faces, or what happened to them. His very first memory was waking up in the chair. But back then, he still retained it all. He practiced, over and over, for hours. He’d repeat their names silently in his head. Good memories, bad memories. He’d already forgotten how he’d gotten hurt, and he’d forgotten the boy with long hair. He refused to forget anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry Hyunjin I love you <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: blood, death  
Things are getting dark

_  
Previously..._

_Felix heard a sound echo behind him. It was muffled, coming from somewhere over in the keepers’ area, but it still reverberated through the floor beneath him. He froze, listening for more. It was rare that they ever heard any disturbance from over there. An icy tendril of dread crept its way into his stomach. There was something bad about that sound. He felt a twinge in his head, a sensation he’d never felt before. It was like a crackling in his brain. He rubbed his temple, trying to will it away. He sat there for a while, trying to understand what was happening inside his head. He was startled when he heard a door clang behind him. Felix scrambled to stand, looking out through his door’s window. Four keepers came through the door on the far wall, to Felix’s left. They were struggling with something. Felix strained to see what they were doing, limited by the angle of his vantage point. He could hear a commotion now; they seemed to be shouting and scuffling. Finally they came over far enough for Felix to see, and he felt a shock run down his spine. The keepers were dragging a boy Felix had never seen.  
_

Another day passed and the attendant came back. He told Hyunjin to sit in the chair. He had to shock him twice before Hyunjin complied. He wheeled in the big machine again, and the tray with the electrodes. There was nothing else on that tray this time. 

It was a while before they shoved the boy through the door again. The Tall Man came along, taking up his usual post. 

The boy walked over, stopping in front of Hyunjin and reaching for one of the nodes. He was standing close enough to block the tall man’s view from the window. Hyunjin noticed he was cradling something in his right hand. The boy looked nervous as he lifted his hand up to Hyunjin’s face, unwinding his fingers to reveal a cracker. Hyunjin felt drool flood his mouth. The boy held his palm up to Hyunjin’s lips and he took the cracker gratefully, chewing as quickly as he could. He understood that the boy was taking a huge risk by slipping him food. The boy wiped the corner of Hyunjin’s mouth with one cold finger as he pressed the electrode on. He moved to get another from the tray, and it seemed that the Tall Man hadn’t noticed what they’d done. 

Once all the electrodes were on, he assumed his position behind the large machine. Hyunjin braced himself. The Tall Man came over the speaker. 

“Five and a half, today.” 

The boy sighed and turned it up a notch. Hyunjin gripped the chair, closing his eyes as the wave of pain hit him. His fingers locked around the chair and he did his best to ride it out. When it was over, he felt dazed and exhausted. The boy took the electrodes off, wiped the tears from Hyunjin’s cheeks, and left.

\---------------

It went on for months. Every few days, he would be shocked. Eventually, the Tall Man stopped watching. He must have grown bored of it. Hyunjin still had his routine of repeating names and events, but he found that it was growing more difficult. There had been one person in particular who he’d been desperate not to forget. But the others? They were fading. 

He got to know the boy better, as time went on. When the Tall Man wasn’t around, he would set the machine to the lowest setting. He also slipped Hyunjin as much food as he could. They could talk, on the occasions they were left alone. 

“So what is this place?” Hyunjin asked one day.

The boy pursed his lips. “It’s a prison, I guess.” He flicked his eyes over his shoulder at the window. No one was there. “Disguised as a research facility.”

Hyunjin nodded. “Why are we here?”

The boy shrugged. “They managed to capture us, after all the shit went down. You remember what happened?”

Hyunjin nodded. “You were there?”

The boy laughed. “Yes, Hyunjin. I was there.”

“How many people are here?” 

The boy shrugged. “I lost count. There are a lot of us. Everyone who was in our program, I think. The seven boys from the GOT faction. Most of the girls from the Second squad got captured too. All of my group. There are some others from different squads as well. But a couple of them…” He ran a hand through his hair. “Are dead. Well, sort of.” 

Hyunjin tilted his head. “How can you be sort of dead?” 

The boy sighed. “Just trust me.”

Another day, Hyunjin got the courage to ask something he’d been wondering about. “They trust you enough to let you walk around?”

The boy scoffed. “Trust me? Nah. They’re using me. I have… a job.” 

“What kind of job?”

He shook his head. “I can’t tell you yet. I don’t think you’re ready to know everything that’s going on here.” 

Hyunjin sighed. “I am, I promise.”

The boy looked at him, searching Hyunjin’s eyes. “Do you remember what you are? What we are?”

Hyunjin thought for a second, but shook his head in the end. “No. And I’m guessing you won’t tell me.”

The boy shook his head again. “They have someone important to me. I’m doing all of this because they’ve agreed to protect someone I love. And if I screw up and get in trouble, they’ll take them away from me. For good.” He shrugged. “And also, you probably wouldn’t trust me anymore.” 

Hyunjin chuckled. “I probably shouldn’t trust you anyway.”

The boy looked struck for a moment, sad. “You really don’t remember me, huh?”

Hyunjin felt sad too. “Were we friends? You and me?”

The boy smiled, a sad, soft smile. “We were best friends, Jinnie.”

Another week went by, and Hyunjin had more questions.

“What’s this cut behind my ear?”

The boy stiffened. “I’m not really supposed to talk about it.” 

Hyunjin tilted his head, rubbing the spot against his shoulder. “Why not?”

He shrugged. “It has to do with my job.” He leaned forward, lifting up the long strands of hair behind his ear. “I have one too.” Hyunjin noticed a long scar curling behind the boy’s ear, just like his own.

“Your job? Are you the one who…”

“No, I didn’t cut you. But I am kind of the reason for it. Something I was working on that they decided to take and use for their own fucked-up means.”

Hyunjin was even more confused. “Did they put something in my head?” 

The boy sighed. “Yeah. They did it to all of us.”

“Why?”

“I don’t really know. I’m not sure what they’re going to do.”

The next day they talked again.

“So we were best friends, huh?”

The boy nodded. 

“Tell me something. A good memory maybe.”

He smiled, a far away look on his face. “You found a kitten, one time. He was so small and helpless, and you saved him from a gutter one day when it was raining hard. We stayed up all night, cleaning him off and finding food to feed him. We ran around, trying to hide it from the adults. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you laugh as hard as when you tucked him in your shirt and he was tickling your stomach. We ended up giving him to a friend who could take better care of him than we could.” 

Hyunjin smiled. “What did we name him?”

“Sunshine. I thought it was stupid, but you liked it, so I went with it.” The boy smiled brightly. Hyunjin liked his smile.

Hyunjin felt just a tickle of a memory that night. 

_An orange kitten, with big green eyes. He was curled up on Hyunjin’s chest, licking one of his feet. Hyunjin giggled, twirling his tail around his finger. Someone else was there, laying beside him. Hyunjin turned to look. _

_His friend was curled up beside him. His hair was dark brown and not as long, but everything else was the same. He reached over, patting the kitten softly on the head. "What are you going to name him?”_

_“Sunshine! Because he’s orange, like sunshine.”_

_His friend laughed, loudly. “Real original, Jinnie.” He reached up and ruffled Hyunjin’s hair. “But I guess it’ll do.”_

A couple of months went by. Hyunjin was slowly forgetting things, although he couldn’t really keep track. How do you remember you’ve forgotten something? He knew one thing for sure though: the person he was trying the hardest not to forget was slipping from his mind. Their face was becoming blurrier, and some days he couldn’t even remember their name. 

He found that he had started to look forward to seeing his friend, though. Their conversations were pretty much all he had to get through his days. 

The Tall Man rarely came around anymore. The boy slipped him food pretty much every day. 

He opened his hand and Hyunjin saw something different this particular day. 

“Grapes,” the boy said. Hyunjin ate them from his palm. He was surprised at how soft they were and how nice the taste was as he bit into one. It was a lot different from the crackers he’d gotten used to. 

He smiled, chewing thoughtfully. “Thank you.”

The boy smiled back, going back to attaching the electrodes. Hyunjin looked up at him.

“Why do you slip me food? Won’t it get you in trouble?” 

The boy nodded. “Yeah, if they found out. I dunno. They feed you less than everyone else. I know you must be hungry.”

Hyunjin looked him over. His face looked thinner than when they first met. His gray scrubs hung looser on his hips now. “But doesn’t that mean you get less?”

The boy nodded. “I’m fine, though. You have to go through all this. I’ll help you however I can. Some of it’s not mine, anyway. Sometimes it comes from another friend of ours. He wants to help you too.”

Hyunjin smiled. Kindness was something that was a rarity to him, these days. 

The days were passing by more quickly now. Hyunjin could barely recall that there was something he was trying to remember. It had become pretty routine. He felt like a year had passed at this point. He looked up from his place in the chair as the boy entered on one particular day.

He looked frazzled, his eyes wide. He walked over to Hyunjin, quickly slipping him a cracker. “Hyunjin, I need you to listen to me.”

Hyunjin nodded as he chewed.

“Things are about to change. I need you to trust me.”

He rubbed his hands through his hair, trying to collect himself. Hyunjin felt fear growing in the pit of his stomach. “What is it?”

“I just found out something. There’s a way out of here, Hyunjin.” 

Hyunjin gasped. “What do you mean?”

“I can’t tell you exactly. If I do, you’ll forget it. They’ll know you’re trying to remember something, and they’ll erase it.”

Hyunjin nodded. “Okay. Give me a hint then, I won’t forget.”

The boy paced in front of him for a second, thinking. He rushed over, his hands finding Hyunjin’s. “Look for the thing that is real among the things that are fake.” 

Hyunjin mouthed the words, trying to slip them into the corners of his mind. Real, fake. Real, fake. 

He repeated those words until he fell asleep that night.

The next day, the boy came in again. His face was pale, but he looked determined. 

He was quiet for a moment as he put the electrodes on. Hyunjin was worried. Finally, he spoke.

“This is probably your last treatment, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin gasped. “What?”

“They’re going to be returning you to the others tomorrow.”

“The others? Who?”

The boy closed his eyes, frowning. “You’ve forgotten. It’s okay.” He went on. “I need you to do something for me. Promise me.”

Hyunjin nodded. “I promise.”

“I did something. I found a way to give you some help in there. It might work, or it might not. I’m going to tell you a name. And you need to repeat it, over and over in your head. Okay? Project it. Say it out loud, but not using your mouth. I know that makes no sense but just promise me you’ll try?” 

“Of course. What is it?” 

He took a deep breath. “Felix.” It came out as a whisper. He looked over his shoulder. “Felix. Say it.”

Hyunjin whispered too. “Felix.” 

“Do you remember that name?”

Hyunjin shook his head. “No, I’ve never heard it.”

The boy’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

He shook his head. “You’ll have to figure that out for yourself.” 

Hyunjin nodded. He was repeating it in his head already. _Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix._

“Find him, okay? You have to find him.”

He walked around behind the machine, preparing to turn it on. Hyunjin gasped as the Tall Man walked in front of the window. The speaker clicked on.

“Put it on 12 this time.”

The boy walked around, standing in front of the window. “No! That will kill him! What are you trying to do?”

A shock came through the floor, and the boy fell to his knees when it let up.

“12. Do it.”

He struggled to stand, glaring through the window. “You’re a monster.”

“You’re testing your luck. Don’t forget what you stand to lose,” the man said back.

The boy walked around to the back, cranking it up. He leaned forward to whisper. “Keep saying it in your head. Don’t forget.”

Hyunjin repeated the name until everything went black. 

_Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Fel-_

\----------------------

Hyunjin came to the next day, he guessed. He was exhausted. He woke up on the floor. He got up to pee, rubbing his head. His brain felt like it could explode. 

He remembered yesterday. He started to repeat the name again, over and over, feeling relieved that he didn’t forget. Maybe everything was going to be okay. The boy said he’d be joining the others today right? That was his final treatment. He was ready now. 

The pudgy attendant came in front of the window. Hyunjin turned to look at him. The speaker clicked on and the man whispered to him. "I'm so sorry." He heard the floor buzz and he dropped, blacking out on the way down. 

He woke up in the chair. The light hummed above him, just like the first day. His vision was swimming. He rolled his head, trying to come back to reality. His hands were bound, but his feet were not. He blinked hard, trying to make sense of what he saw in front of him. The door was open. Several attendants stood huddled around, fear written on their faces. Hyunjin swung his head forward.

Standing just in front of him was the Tall Man. He’d never seen his face before, but he knew it was him. He was an old man, wrinkled gray with sharp fierce features. He had a deep scar cutting across his left cheek. He grinned wickedly at Hyunjin. Hyunjin heard a small sound and he looked down.

His friend was on his knees beside the man, some of his long blond hair twisted in the man’s closed fist. Blood was pouring from his nose and one of his eyes was black. His hands seemed to be tied behind his back. The man twisted his wrist, forcing the boy’s head up. 

“Is this what you wanted, then?” the man said out loud. Hyunjin wasn’t sure which one of them he was talking to.

“Your friend here kept sticking his nose where it doesn’t belong. He’s gotten the misguided idea that he can save you all. How stupid.”

The boy turned his head as much as he could, spitting blood on the man’s shoes. The man growled and brought his left hand down to strike him in the face. He sagged a little, being held up by the grip on his hair. 

The man continued, turning to Hyunjin. “I hate to admit that I don’t know what kind of garbage he’s been filling your head with, but your brain is most likely just soup now after your treatment yesterday. I don’t want you getting any ideas, though. You aren’t getting out of here. None of you are.” He twisted his hand again, a strangled sound coming from the boy. “Least of all, you.”

Hyunjin felt a primal fear sinking its way into his stomach. He flicked his eyes over to the attendants. They were terrified, holding onto each other in fright. He turned back to the man.

“You know, Hyunjin, the whole reason for all of this was so you would forget. I wanted to take every memory from you and start you over new.” He reached his left hand around behind him as he went on. “But this? This is something I want you to remember, every day until the day you die.”

He pulled his hand around and Hyunjin felt the icy grip of fear take him over. The man was holding a revolver that glinted in the bright light. He cocked the gun; the sound it made causing them all to flinch. Hyunjin looked down. The boy was looking back at him, determination in his eyes. 

The man pressed the barrel to the boy’s temple. He shuddered violently, but he kept his eyes on Hyunjin. 

He whispered to him one last time. “Don’t forget.”

The sound of the gun going off rocked Hyunjin to his core. He felt hot blood spray against his face. The sound had deafened him for a moment, but when his hearing faded back in, all he could hear was screaming. It was his own.

The boy had gone limp, his once-blond hair nearly black with blood. He was motionless, held up only by the man’s hand. His eyes were empty. 

Hyunjin screamed so loudly that he thought he was going to black out. He wanted to look away but all he could see was his friend’s face. Blood was everywhere, all over Hyunjin’s clothes. The man grimaced. 

He let go of the boy’s hair, tossing his body forward to rest against Hyunjin’s knee. Hyunjin kept screaming, screaming. It felt like it would never end. He felt blood seeping through his clothes and down his skin, filling his shoes. His friend was gone, Hyunjin knew it. 

The man spoke again. “Let this be a warning to you.” He had to shout to be heard over Hyunjin’s wailing. Hyunjin felt tears streaming over his face. 

The man turned to the attendants. “Put him with the others.”

“After that? Can’t we clean him up first?”

The man cocked the gun again, pointing it at the one who had spoken. “Do it! Unless you want to join him in hell.” He pointed back to the body, still resting against Hyunjin. The man disappeared around the corner.

The keepers unlocked the chair, freeing Hyunjin. He was still screaming, trying to catch his breath in short bursts. He fell to the ground, wrapping his arms around his friend. “No! No please, please don’t let this be true! Fuck you, don’t touch me!”

The keepers tried to pull him off, but he swung at them, furious. “Leave me alone!” One of them kicked him in the head, staggering him for a moment. They dragged him away, kicking and swinging. Another of them pulled out a thick rope, all of them struggling to pull Hyunjin’s arms behind his back. The adrenaline was beginning to tank and his energy was running out, but he still tried to fight. His screams echoed off the walls. Someone slapped a strip of duct tape across his mouth, but his face was so slick with tears and blood that it barely stuck on. 

They dragged him out the door. He caught one last glimpse of his friend, slumped on the floor, all alone. 

He fought them the whole way. They dragged him through the hallway and through another door, and then finally through the door to the cell block. He was twisting, screaming, kicking. He knew nothing would bring his friend back but he couldn’t let them get away with this. The cell door rolled open and they tossed him in. His elbows hit the ground hard, taking the wind from his lungs. His screaming finally stopped as the pudgy man leaned down, ripping the tape off his face. The man’s expression was unreadable, half angry and half terrified, distraught. He shoved Hyunjin back down with his boot. 

Hyunjin laid there as the door rolled closed. He was in shock. His mind replayed what he’d just seen. The bang of the gun echoed in his head. He felt the blood cooling on his skin. He sobbed silently, his voice gone now. His hands were still tied painfully behind him, so he rolled onto his side. He felt the floor beneath his feet grow slick with blood. He tried not to think about it. He finally must have passed out, because when he opened his eyes again, it was dark.

He laid there, feeling completely hopeless. His friend was dead. There was nothing he could do to save him. Was it Hyunjin’s fault? Did he slip up, did they hear them talking? Why today? He thought back to the day before. 

_Don’t forget,_ he’d said. Hyunjin resolved himself. He wouldn’t forget. What had he said? Real, fake. Felix. Real, fake. Felix.

He decided to try what his friend had told him. He started repeating the name in his head, as hard as he could. He said it over, and over, and over. He wouldn’t give up. This must have meant something if his friend died for it. 

_Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix._

Nothing happened, so he tried again. 

_Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix, Felix._

He said it over and over again, finally feeling himself lose steam. Tears streamed down his face now. Nothing was happening. 

He tried one last time. 

_Felix. _

_Felix. _

_Felix. _

Finally, a voice. _Who are you?_

Hyunjin gasped. 

_F-Felix? Can you hear me?___

_ _

_ _\----------------------_ _

_ _As Hyunjin finished his story, the table was silent. He looked up at everyone. Felix was crying, biting his lip hard. Minho stared at the table, unbelieving. Everyone else was in a state of shock, some of them crying too._ _

_ _Chan sat at the end of the table, his jaw slack. He looked over Hyunjin’s face, trying to process what he’d just heard. Suddenly Chan stood, jolting the others from their shock. He came around the side of the table, stopping beside Hyunjin. He leaned down, examining his face closer. Hyunjin felt tears drying on his cheeks. He must have started crying at some point._ _

_ _Chan struggled for words, his mouth opening and closing several times. Finally, he spoke. “He’s dead?”_ _

_ _Hyunjin nodded, shrugging a little. “Yeah. I think so.”_ _

_ _Chan straightened up, thinking quietly for a second. “Long blond hair?”_ _

_ _Hyunjin nodded. “Yeah.”_ _

_ _Chan looked around at each of the boys at the table. They all stared back at him, confused. His eyes flicked to each of them, searching for something. He turned suddenly, pacing back and forth. “There’s no way. You all really don’t remember?” _ _

_ _Felix stood. “Remember what, Chan?”_ _

_ _Chan turned back to them, tears streaming down his face. His mouth dropped into a frown as he tried to form a thought. Finally, he whispered. “He was our friend. Jeonghan.”_ _

_ _They all looked at him. Hyunjin tugged Chan’s sleeve. “What did you say?”_ _

_ _Chan wiped his eyes. “His name was Jeonghan. He was one of us.”_ _

_ _Everyone gaped, looking around at each other. Felix walked over to Chan, sliding an arm around his back. “You knew him?”_ _

_ _Chan shook his head. “We all did. We grew up together. All of us.”_ _

_ _Everyone was standing now, surrounding Chan. Hyunjin couldn’t tear his eyes away._ _

_ _Felix finally worked up the words that everyone was thinking. “Are you starting to remember things, Chan?”_ _

_ _Chan shook his head, letting out a deep sigh before he looked around at them, taking in each of their faces before he spoke. “It’s not that I’m starting to remember. It’s that I never forgot.”_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! This is a multi-fandom fic! (Sorry if you weren’t expecting, I just have a lot of big ideas) 
> 
> There’s gonna be ITZY, Day6, GOT7, Twice, and Seventeen members making cameos. Our stray kids aren’t alone. The Tall Man is an OC, not based on anyone real, same with the keepers. 
> 
> PS Killing off my best boy is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever written :( I will make it up to him


	10. Chapter 10

They sat in a circle on the floor, near the entrance to the maze. The overhead lights had shut off a minute ago, probably on a timer. Their cell doors were still open, and there was no food, just as they suspected. They sat near the maze so they could still see each other’s faces in the light that came from it. 

Chan ran a shaky hand through his hair. “I’ll tell you some of what I know. I can’t tell you everything. It would be too much all at once.” 

Felix grimaced. Of course, nothing could be that easy. The others nodded.

“I’ll start from the beginning, more or less. We’ve all been together for a long time, but we came from different places. Some of us came in with others, or a few came in by ourselves, but we all had one thing in common: we had no parents. We were a bunch of stray kids with no families. Some of us were in orphanages, others on the street. A lot of our parents were killed in the battles that went on between the districts. When we were younger, most of the districts were run down, controlled by their various governments.” 

“We were taken in by a group called Safe Haven. They sent word that they were able to take in all orphans in the districts, and there were a lot of us. Hundreds, at least. They made it seem as though they wanted to provide a safe place for us to get an education away from the war and crime that was tearing through our country. But that wasn’t the case.” Chan paused, looking around at each of them.

“I was one of the first kids they brought in. I was a little older than most of you guys, and I’d been living on the streets ever since my mom passed away. I was getting sick of fighting the big kids for food scraps, so I agreed to follow the nice man who offered me a place to stay. Dr. Yon was his name. They took me to the Haven, which is where we grew up. It was sort of like this place, only nicer. More like a school, or a university. We weren’t locked down, we just couldn’t leave the grounds. Not like we needed to. They gave us all the food we could eat and a warm, dry place to sleep. We were happy.”

He turned to Hyunjin. “You were one of the first to arrive after me.”

Hyunjin tilted his head. “Really?”

Chan nodded. “Yeah, it was you and three others: a girl named Yeji, and two other boys, Hansol and Jeonghan.”

Hyunjin felt his heart sink. He remembered what Jeonghan had told him. _”We were best friends, Jinnie.”_

“Jeonghan had been taking care of you. He was the oldest, and Hansol was his younger brother. He’d picked up you and Yeji somewhere along the way. He was a fierce kid, he tried to claw my eyeballs out the first time I tried to speak to any of you. I desperately wanted friends back then. You four were very protective of each other. Yeji wouldn’t let go of your elbow that first day, she was so scared. Eventually, we all became close, like brothers and sisters.” Chan shrugged. “I guess I kind of thought we’d always be together, back then. We were really happy.” 

Chan looked around again. “The rest of you showed up soon after. Changbin, Jeongin, and Minho all came from the same place, although I don’t think any of you are related. Jisung, they’d found you in an abandoned building. You were covered in so much soot that I almost didn’t recognize you after they’d washed you off. You still had those big cheeks though, so I knew it was you.” 

Everyone chuckled a little, Minho nudging him with his elbow. Jisung grinned. 

“Felix, you showed up a while later. You didn’t really know how to speak, so we had to teach you. Seungmin, Woojin, you two came in together too.” 

Everyone was looking around, squinting at each other, trying to remember.

“There were lots of others. We each had a bunch of close friends. I hope some day you’ll remember them all. We eventually got split into groups, they called them Units. Some were larger, some smaller. Ours was the nine of us. Our group name was literally just “The Nine.” We were together all the time, pretty much. We still saw the others, but we all trained together.”

Jisung piped up. “Trained? For what?”

Chan sighed, a vacant look taking over his expression. “They said it was survival skills but that was a lie, to cover what it really was for:” he ran a hand through his hair, looking down. “Combat.”

Felix felt numb, his tongue heavy in his mouth. “C-combat?”

The others were silent. Hyunjin recalled something from before. 

“Can I ask you something, Chan?”

“Of course.”

He took a deep breath. “It’s something Jeonghan said to me. He asked me if I remembered what I was. What _we_ were. Do you know what he meant?”

Chan nodded, gaze fixed at a spot on the floor. “Yeah, I do. I wasn’t going to come right out with it, but…” He looked around at them again. “We were modified. They did something to us, I’m a little fuzzy of some of the details. They started giving us injections, treatments. They enhanced us so that we’d heal quicker, hit harder, run faster, stuff like that. It made us all smarter, too. Essentially, they were making us into bioweapons, under the guise of being an educational organization, caring for orphaned children.” 

Felix felt his jaw drop. _A… bioweapon? Trained for combat?_ He looked down at his hands, noting how small they were, how thin the skin seemed. “We were… soldiers?” He spoke almost without meaning to.

Chan nodded again. “Yeah, to boil it down. Some of us had extra skills. Woojin ended up with insane eyesight. You were our lookout.” Woojin leaned back, looking around, but he remained silent. “Others of us had jobs, specialties. Minho, you were good at robotics. You could build damn near anything they asked for. I was more into electrical stuff, like wiring. They had me wire up several of your creations.”

Chan turned to Felix. “You worked with metal. You could weld things and you carved beautiful designs sometimes.” He chuckled, reaching out to take Felix’s hand. “Believe it or not, you were strong enough to bend some metals with your bare hands. No one fucked with you after that.”

Hyunjin swallowed thickly. “What was Jeonghan’s job?”

Everyone turned to him. Chan sighed, dropping Felix’s hand. “Did he mention it?” Hyunjin nodded. 

Chan sighed. “Jeonghan became a programmer. He could write anything, and fast. He wrote communication systems, databases, and a number of other things. He was also big into microchips and motherboards. Before the shit hit the fan, he’d come up with something big. It’s the reason why we ended up where we did. I’m pretty sure… they’re still using it now.” 

Hyunjin reached up, feeling his scar. “Microchips.”

Chan nodded. “Yeah. Like the ones that I’m pretty sure are in all of our heads.”

All of the boys looked around, each reaching up to rub behind their ear. Chan went on. “He didn’t know what he was making until it was too late. They’d asked him to create a multipurpose device for field usage. It was supposed to be a microchip that could communicate remotely with other chips on the network. It was also supposed to expand the natural memory of the brain, allowing for the storage of more information. He called it:”

\------------------

“Memory Card.” Jeonghan grinned, tugging Chan’s sleeve. “You have to come see this.” 

They’d rushed down the hall to the large computer lab where the boys did most of their work. Jeonghan dragged Chan over to his desk, sitting him down in the chair in front of it. A fat, orange cat slept on the keyboard. “Move your ass, Sunshine,” Jeonghan said, as he picked the cat up and placed him on the ground. He reached over Chan, booting up the computer. A load of files were open on the two screens, and Chan pored over them.

“What is it supposed to do?” 

“When it’s hooked into the brain, it will allow extra storage. It essentially will translate your memory data into binary code and store it here, onto this micro hard drive.” 

Chan rubbed his chin, glancing at the code samples on the screen. “How are you going to power this thing if it’s in someone’s head?” 

Jeonghan grinned, leaning down to drape his arms over Chan’s shoulders. “Well, that’s why you’re here, Bang Channie.” Chan rolled his eyes. He should have known.

“Alright, if you add in a modulator and a miniature transformer, I think I can figure out how to make it work.” He glanced over at a list, on the corner of the second screen. It seemed to be a list of features. _Communication, enhanced processing speed, body status indicators, geolocation._ “What else can this thing do?”

Jeonghan straightened up, moving to lean against the edge of the desk. “That’s where I’m a little waffley. I’ve written a program for communication. Anyone who has a chip can be linked to any other person with a chip, through this program. They can speak to each other, in their heads. I’m not exactly sure how the details are going to work, but the neuroscientist on staff believes it’s possible. There’s one other thing, though.”

Chan tilted his head. “What?”

“They want me to add in GPS tracking. And…” He ran a hand through his dark hair, which was just beginning to grow long back then. “They want me to add in a system override.”

Chan jolted a little. “Wait, like, mind control?”

Jeonghan nodded. “Exactly like mind control. They could remotely access a chip through the program and take over the wearer. Same with the GPS, they could use the program to locate the wearer at any time. I really, really don’t like that.”

Chan shook his head. “I don’t either. Can you just… not do it?”

Jeonghan shrugged. “I can try. If I don’t, someone else will. But don’t worry, worst case scenario, I can get back in and scramble their code.” He leaned closer. “I always leave myself with a way out, Chan.” 

\---------------------

Chan sighed, finishing his story. “I promise you guys: we didn’t know back then. We didn’t know we were on the wrong side. We believed what they told us. But god, we _were_ on the wrong side.”

Jeongin spoke up. “Wait, so these scars… there are microchips in our heads? And we can talk to each other?”

Chan grimaced. “Yes, there are very likely chips in each of our heads. But no, we can’t speak to each other.” Chan looked at Felix, then at Hyunjin. “Well, except for those two, I guess. Anyway, there’s more to the story.”

\---------------------

Six months later, Jeonghan skidded into Chan’s room, slamming the door behind him. Woojin looked up from the book he was reading on the top bunk. “Jesus, Hani. What’s wrong?” 

Chan rubbed his eyes, woken up from his afternoon nap. “Yeah, what is it?”

“God I think I fucked up.” Jeonghan was pacing, pressing his palms into his eyes. “I fucked up, guys.” 

Chan shook his head, trying to come back to full consciousness. “What are you talking about?”

He paced across their small dorm room, frantic. “You remember the chips? The Memory Card project? So they basically took that out of my hands a week ago, but they don’t know that I put a backdoor in my program, so I can watch everything they do.” He sat on a chair in the corner of the room, tapping his foot anxiously. “I refused, so they added the GPS themselves, just like I figured they would. But they did something else, something I wasn’t expecting.” He sighed, and Chan noticed his hands were shaking. “They reverse-engineered the protocol that imports the user’s memories into the chip. Instead of storing them in an accessible manner, they’re encrypting them.”

Chan looked at him, confused. “So what exactly does that mean?”

“They’re storing the memories in a way that the brain can’t read. Essentially, they’ll be locking away any memories that get stored on the chip. More or less, erasing them from your brain.” He dragged his hands through his hair, staring at the floor. “That’s literally the opposite of what they said they wanted.” He looked up, his eyes wild. “They fucking tricked me, Chan.” 

Chan felt his stomach drop. More and more things lately had ended up like this: their superiors asking for one thing and then using it for nefarious means. They’d taken several of Minho’s creations, using them to increase surveillance on the citizens of the districts. Chan had wired them, making sure they would work in all types of weather. Jeonghan had written the program to transmit the data. Even Seungmin had worked on it, assembling the camera. Dr. Yon had promised them it was for tracking weather data only. The boys hadn’t found out until it was too late. “So what can we do?”

Jeonghan shook his head. “I destroyed a bunch of my research. And then I went in and screwed up their program from the inside. I locked up the communication channels from the backend. I encrypted it so only I know how to connect the chips now. That means they won’t be able to tap into our thoughts. I also scrambled the GPS readings, it will just show phony locations. They’re going to beat the shit out of me when they find out.” He scrambled for his phone, fumbling with it because of his shaking hands. “I’ll give the encryption code to a few other people, ones I trust. Like you. “ He held out his phone, a QR code on the screen. Chan held his phone over it, scanning. A file appeared in his downloads, labelled _\--dev notes--_. Jeonghan chuckled, humorless. “No one ever reads dev notes. Inside is the code necessary to get you to the interface to connect the chips. I honestly don’t know what this thing is capable of now. There might be more features I don’t know about. If any of us talk to each other, could they hear it? I don’t know. And also, I don’t want them to be able to read our thoughts, even if the chips aren’t connected.” 

Chan nodded. “What about the memories? Is there any way to unencrypt them?” 

Jeonghan grinned, “I’ve already written a virus that will break down their encryption. They picked a really complicated encryption system, but this thing can crack it. It’s slow, though, so I don’t know how soon it would allow people to remember things. I’m giving that to you, too.” 

He held his phone out again, a different QR code. Chan scanned that one too. He didn’t know what the Haven planned to do with this project, but he found himself deeply afraid.

Chan looked up. “Something terrible is about to happen, isn’t it?”

Jeonghan nodded. “They just put out an order to implant everyone in Safe Haven with these chips. I’m the first one.”

Chan swallowed the lump in his throat, the fear in his friend’s eyes threatening to consume him whole. Anything could happen now. They were terrified of what they didn’t know.

\-------------------

“But now, I know. They used it to erase our memories. They encrypted them, but it’s a slow process, so that’s why they were electrocuting us. They were trying to speed up the encryption by creating an electrical pathway to the chip. I knew what they were doing when they sat me down, attaching electrodes to my head. They shocked me once, and I probably lost some stuff, but I just pretended I’d lost everything. There was so much chaos with you guys, I must have slipped through the cracks.”

Everyone was silent for a moment. Finally, Felix spoke up. “So there’s a virus? A way for us to get our memories back?” 

Chan nodded. “Yeah, but I’ll have to get access to my phone. And who knows where it is. They might’ve destroyed it.”

Jisung spoke up. “So what happened before this? Why are we here? You said the shit hit the fan.”

Chan shook his head. “I can’t tell you that just yet. It’s something I don’t really want to remember. You all got hurt, badly. We lost some of our friends. I hope maybe you won’t remember at all, but I won’t be the one to tell you. There are some things you all need to remember on your own.”

Something occurred to Hyunjin just then. “So that means he must have connected my chip to Felix’s? Is that why we can hear each other? Why just us and not the others?”

Chan smiled a little. “I have a feeling why, knowing him. But I can’t say for sure. You’ll figure it out soon.”

Jisung traced a little circle on the ground with his finger. “Do you think… that’s why they killed him?”

Chan shrugged. “I don’t know. That seems like a crazy reaction for something like that. I think there’s more that we don’t know.”

Hyunjin thought of another question. “Who is the Tall Man? Is that the Dr. Yon you mentioned?”

“No, the man with the scar is named Martin Flagg. He’s a foreigner, he came here to work for the Haven as the CEO.”

Minho grinned. “Please tell me one of us gave him that scar.”

Chan smiled. “Yes, one of you did. It was magnificent.”

They looked around at each other, searching. They’d been together all this time? They were lifelong friends? And there were others? It seemed so strange. 

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes, running a fingertip over the blood stain on his knee. “I’m going to kill that man, if it’s the last thing I do.”

The others nodded, somber. Changbin reached over, rubbing Hyunjin’s shoulder gently. 

Chan turned to look behind him. “So there was something real among the fake things, you said? That must have been important.” 

Hyunjin nodded. “I think one of the vines is real. I don’t know why, or how. I think the maze itself is a trap. Why else would they put it here?”

Felix nodded. “I’ve never felt like there was any possibility of there being an exit at the end.”

Minho stood suddenly. “Well we’re going to starve to death, one way or another. I say we get in there, and we look for whatever we can find.”

The others stood, peering in. Minho approached the door, turning back to the others. Shadows darkened his face, making him look much older. “We go together. No one gets lost.” He held out his hand to Chan, who took it firmly in his grasp. Chan turned to take Changbin’s, and Changbin took Felix’s, and so on. Felix turned and gripped Hyunjin’s hand tightly in his own. He felt so guilty for distrusting him. 

Hyunjin studied Felix’s face in the dim light. He smiled. _We stick together, no matter what._

Felix nodded. _I’m sorry about your friend._ He squeezed his hand again. _But I’m glad we can hear each other. I can’t replace the one you lost, but…_ Felix felt his cheeks grow hot. _I’m your friend, no matter what._

Hyunjin smiled, wide and bright. _I’m your friend too, Felix._

Minho tugged them on, entering the maze. The lights shined off their white jumpsuits, nine ghosts weaving through a forest of ivy. Felix felt exhilarated, alive. For the first time that he could remember.


	11. Chapter 11

It didn't take long to reach the clearing. Felix had been here before, but only once. It was a section of the maze that was more open, a circular area with openings all around. Felix counted to see how many. Nine, counting the one they'd come in through. 

Chan pulled the map out of his pocket as the others stopped to look around. Hyunjin spun around in wonder, peering down each corridor. Felix turned to see Woojin pull a long strand of ivy loose, tying it to the other side, across the doorway they'd come through. He noticed Felix watching him. 

"This is how I got lost, that day. I couldn't remember which door led back to the front." He finished tying it, stepping back to examine his work. "I figured from then on that it was a good idea to mark which door is the exit."

Felix nodded. They may never need to come back this way, but if they do, discerning one door from another would be nearly impossible. 

Chan rotated the paper, walking over to stand beside Woojin. He sighed. "Most of these just lead to dead ends, but there are three I haven't tried yet. One is bound to lead us somewhere, right?"

Woojin shrugged. "You'd think so. But nothing is as it seems here."

Chan looked at his map and back at the doors for a while. Finally, he folded it and slipped it back into his pocket. He pointed to one nearby, just one doorway to the right of the one they came in through. "Let's try this one."

Everyone grabbed hands again, forming a chain. If anyone got left behind, they could lose valuable time. Felix took a deep breath, hoping he could keep up. Hyunjin squeezed his hand. 

_Doing okay?_

Felix nodded. _I'm just worried. What if we don't find anything? _

Hyunjin shook his head. _There's gotta be something. I feel it. _

They started moving again. Chan led the way, ducking his head around corners and spotting the dead ends. Felix turned to look back. Woojin brought up the rear, clinging tightly to Jeongin's hand. He'd make sure no one got disconnected. 

They walked for a long time, down hallways that twisted and turned. They ran into two dead ends, having to backtrack carefully. Chan stopped when they reached a third dead end. 

"It looks like this isn't the way." He turned to them with a sad look. Everyone nodded, turning to face the other direction. They wound back the way they came, only making one wrong turn before they found themselves back at the clearing. Felix grimaced, his stomach growling. That attempt had taken an hour or so. He didn't know how long he could keep walking. 

Hyunjin peered through the door next to the one they'd just tried. "What about this one, Chan?" 

Chan pulled his map out again, squinting as he oriented himself. "I haven't been down that one yet. Let's give it a shot." 

Minho paused. “Felix, you okay?”

Felix nodded, although he felt a little faint. “Yeah, for now. But if this one isn’t it, I might need to sit down.”

Minho nodded. He took Felix’s hand. “Stay by me then.” 

They started off again. Felix felt a rush of deja vu. More dead ends, more dead ivy. They went down one long, promising path, but it too stopped short. Chan growled in frustration. 

They tried down a hallway off to the side. Another stop. Tears pricked Felix’s eyes. He couldn’t take this much longer. 

Chan turned again, frustration evident on his face. “I’m afraid it’s not this one either.” 

Everyone sighed, deflating. Seungmin shook his head. “ONLY ONE MORE LEFT THOUGH, RIGHT? THE NEXT ONE’S GOTTA BE IT.” 

Jisung nodded too. “Come on guys, let’s head back.”

Felix felt Minho tugging him along, but his feet kept dragging. He was numb, barely able to feel Hyunjin tugging on his other hand. Walls were passing on either side and he felt dizzy. Someone was talking up ahead, but the words sounded muffled and far away. Before he realized it, he felt one of his feet go out from underneath him and he tripped, falling hard onto his knee. Minho stopped, whirling around as Hyunjin stumbled, trying not to fall over Felix. 

Felix shook his head, slumping down fully to the floor. He must have tripped on a vine, because one was wrapped around his ankle. Minho knelt down, trying to help him unwrap it. “Are you okay?” He tugged the vine over Felix’s shoe.

Felix nodded. “My knee hurts some.” 

Hyunjin stepped to the side, looking at the wall beside Felix. “That’s weird, I haven’t seen any other vines on the ground.”

Minho looked up, as the others made their way around. “Now that you mention it…” He stood, pulling aside some of the vines. They looked thicker here, and a few of them were long enough to pool on the ground. Felix rubbed his knee, watching as Minho continued to pull the vines apart. 

Minho gasped suddenly. He braced himself, yanking the vines apart with all his strength. Jisung gasped, behind Felix. “There’s no wall!” 

Felix scrambled to his feet as Minho reached through, his arm disappearing through the green strands. Chan moved to grab a handful of vines on one side as Changbin went to grab them on the other side. They pulled and Felix could see lights on the other side. Minho ducked his head and slipped through the opening, Hyunjin followed behind him, and Woojin and Jisung after that. Chan nodded for Felix to follow them. 

He struggled through the gap, carefully lifting his foot through the tangled vines and setting it on the other side. He ducked his head through. There was a whole room on the other side, completely walled in except for the small gap that was covered in vines. The others stepped through one by one, Chan being the last. They gathered around, speechless. 

The room was empty except for a pedestal in the middle. On top of it was a metal box, one that looked like a suitcase but without a handle. It had a latch on the front. The boys stood around, looking from each other to the box and back. No one seemed to know what to say. 

Felix swallowed, his throat feeling very dry. “Should we open it?”

Hyunjin nodded, stepping forward. “This has to be it, right? What we’ve been looking for.” He ran his fingers over the latch. He paused, looking over his shoulder. “You guys ready?”

Everyone nodded. Minho had his eyes fixed on the box. Woojin extended his arm, tucking Felix and Jeongin behind him. Chan pulled Changbin to his chest, stroking his hair. The others stood, silent.

Hyunjin flipped the latch and the top popped up just a little. He swung the hook down, running his fingers just inside the opening. Nothing seemed to happen, so he slowly lifted the top. Felix peered closer, straining to see past Woojin’s arm. 

The top of the box had what looked to be a screen, with a small hole in the top. The bottom of the box was a flat surface with slats in it, like some sort of rolling door. Hyunjin tugged on it a little, but it didn’t budge. 

He looked for a button, something to turn the screen on, but he couldn’t find anything. “It’s not doing anything.” 

Minho stepped up, pointing at the hole in the top of the screen. “Lean closer. I think that might be a camera.”

Hyunjin leaned in, waving his hand in front of it. Sure enough, the screen came on, a machine somewhere in the box whirring to life. Everyone jumped a little, surprised at the sound. Words began to fill the screen, red text on a black background. Hyunjin’s voice wavered as he began to read out loud. 

“Congratulations on solving the maze. It has been 419 days.” Hyunjin swallowed thickly. “You have the opportunity to free yourself and the remaining unit members,” the next line stood by itself, in bold and all caps. “HWANG HYUNJIN.” 

His hands were shaking now. “This has been an experiment designed to evaluate your viability to re-enter the field as an active agent. You have passed the first test by finding this room. Your final test will prove you have reached the end of your rehabilitation.”

“Rehabilitation?” Felix whispered. 

“If you are ready to take this final test, nod your head in agreement.” He leaned into the camera and nodded once. The machine clicked and Hyunjin pulled back, startled. The bottom of the box began to open, the surface rolling back to reveal a chamber underneath. All of the members rushed closer, looking around Hyunjin to see what was inside. It was a smooth box, long and rectangular in shape. Hyunjin reached in, his hand shaking so hard he had to try twice to grip the top of the smaller box. He lifted the top. 

Hyunjin pulled his hand back like he’d been stung. The blood rushed from his face. Felix couldn’t see at first, from where he was standing behind Hyunjin. Minho sputtered, “What the fuck? What the fuck, why? What is that for?”

Felix finally gained leverage, pulling himself up over Hyunjin’s shoulder. His eyes traced over what was in front of him, shaken for just a moment by disbelief. Inside the smaller box was a knife. This wasn’t like the blunt knife they were given with their food. It had a long, sharp blade glinting in the dim light of the room. The handle was intricate, navy blue with silver swirling patterns. At the end of the handle was a four pointed star. 

More words flashed up on the screen, but Felix’s eyes were fixed on the blade. Hyunjin began to read again. “To prove to us that you are ready to return to the field, you will need to complete your rehabilitation by…” he trailed off, a choking sound coming from his throat. Felix dragged his eyes up to the screen, reading the sentence where Hyunjin had stopped.

YOU WILL NEED TO COMPLETE YOUR REHABILITATION  
BY KILLING A MEMBER OF YOUR UNIT.

Everyone stood frozen, rooted to the spot. It was deathly silent, almost as though no one was breathing. Hyunjin turned around, tears streaming down his cheeks. They all looked around at each other. The end of the maze…

The final test…

Was to kill one of their friends.

Minho sucked in a breath, tapping on Hyunjin’s shoulder. Hyunjin turned to see him pointing at the screen. There was more text now. 

“We will be watching via the cameras for the completion of this test. You must commit the termination in a common area, where we can verify completion. Once you have accomplished your mission, we will open the doors and collect you for transport back to the District. The unit member you have been assigned to terminate is:”

A cursor blinked on a new line, over and over and over, a red line blaring against the black screen. Finally, a word appeared, a collective gasp stealing the breath from their lungs.

FELIX

Hyunjin shouted, a loud cry. Minho slammed the top closed. Woojin turned, pulling Felix into his arms. Felix felt frozen, empty. The others gathered around him, hugging him from all sides. Changbin sobbed, his fists pressed against his eyes. Jisung was crying too, leaning down to wipe the tears that were falling down Felix’s numb cheeks. 

Hyunjin turned to him, wringing his hands together so hard his knuckles were white. “I won’t! Felix I won’t, I promise!” He shook his head, tears spilling from his eyes. “I could never, I won’t do it.” His shoulders shook as he sobbed. Minho rubbed Hyunjin’s arms, trying to calm him. The room fell silent again, except for sniffles and Changbin’s sobbing. Chan was frozen solid, staring at the box. 

Seungmin spoke up, trying his best to keep his voice soft. “Don’t forget, they’re all gone!” Everyone looked up, stopping their sniffling while he talked. “Even if we did what it asked, which we won’t,” he looked at Felix, his eyes full of compassion and concern, “They aren’t here to let us out anyway. The test can’t be completed. They can’t open the doors.” 

They looked at each other, nodding slowly. They wouldn’t have to do it. Felix felt relief flood his body, finally getting the feeling back in his fingers. Hyunjin still stared at him, his eyes swollen from crying, just like the first day. Felix swallowed, trying to muster a small smile. _It’s okay. I know you wouldn’t. I trust you._

Hyunjin’s lips quirked up too, just a bit. 

Chan stepped forward suddenly, toward the box. Minho eyed him carefully, standing in front of it. Chan sighed. “I’m not going to touch the knife. I just…” He gritted his teeth, his face pale. “I just want to see something.”

Minho nodded, stepping back a little. Chan squared himself in front of the box, opening it slowly and leaning toward the camera. The message started up again. “Congratulations on solving the maze. It has been 419 days. You have the opportunity to free yourself and the remaining unit members, BANG CHAN.” 

Surely enough, the text now said Chan’s name. The text continued to appear, reaching the end again. The knife still sat in its box. The cursor blinked again, just as it had before Felix’s name had appeared. A shiver ran through him, as he wondered if his name would show up this time too. It blinked, once, twice, and then--

WOOJIN

Chan grit his teeth even harder, tears spilling freely now. He turned around, lowering the lid to the box. “Just as I expected.” He wiped his eyes roughly, clearing his throat. “It’s different for each of us.” 

Jeongin spoke up. “There has to be another way, right? What about what Hyunjin said before? About a vine being real.” 

Jisung nodded. “Yeah, I don’t think we should give up on that. Where do you think it could be?”

Chan thought for a moment, a realization dawning over his features. “In the only part of the maze where we’d be too distracted to see it.” 

Woojin nodded. “This room.”

Everyone turned, scanning the walls. Felix felt like his shoes were full of lead, but with great effort he moved himself from where he stood. They started scouring the walls, tugging on vines as they went. Changbin and Jisung crawled around on hands and knees, tugging on the bottoms of the vines. Felix could barely focus his eyes, everything was a blur of green, made worse by the tears still threatening to fall. 

He was to be _killed._

By Hyunjin. 

Why did that hurt, so very much? Because he could hear his voice in his head? Of course he didn’t want to die, but… Hyunjin. Why did it have to be him?  
He almost wasn’t paying attention when his hand closed around something that felt different. It felt strange, cold. He pulled his hand back, examining the vine there. It was just slightly lighter green, but the texture was so strange. It was shiny but prickly, its leaves smaller than the other vines. It was woven in behind some other vines, so he carefully followed it, afraid to let go. It was long, winding several feet across the wall. It disappeared beneath the wall, not ending but seeming to go straight beneath it. He spoke up, his voice shaking. “Guys? I think I have something.”

Everyone rushed over, surrounding Felix where he knelt on the floor. He held up his hand, exposing the vine he’d found. It was still woven in behind the others so he couldn’t pull it up very far. “It looks like it goes underneath the wall. There’s a small gap.”

Woojin leaned down, examining it too. “What’s behind this wall?”

Chan looked at his map. “It looks like two walls meet behind this one, if my map is correct. I didn’t know this room was here so I didn’t account for the space it took up. But paths from doors 2 and 5 meet here in two dead ends.” He pointed in the general direction of the other hallways that formed the walls of this strange room. 

“Look out, I’m going to break it down.” Jeongin motioned for Felix to move out of the way. He reluctantly let the vine go, afraid that it would somehow disappear if he did so. 

Jeongin leaned back, curling his leg up before kicking straight out. His foot collided with the wall in a loud bang, and it gave a little, but didn’t break. He kicked again, and Felix could hear a splintering sound. 

Woojin came to stand beside Jeongin, pulling his leg back to help him kick. Felix flinched with every kick, but finally there was a splintering crack as the wall gave way. Jeongin reached forward, pulling on the splintered piece of the wall and yanking back, pulling it free. Seungmin pulled on the other side, yanking it back as far as he could. 

Jeongin slipped through the opening. “Whoa, there’s a hallway here.” He knelt down. “And the vine keeps going!” The walls were bare, no vines on them. The vine Felix had found wound its way down the middle, turning a corner and growing up against the wall there. Jeongin followed it excitedly, ducking around the corner. The others followed him, Chan running dead into Jeongin’s back where he had stopped short, the vine still clutched in his hand. The others tripped and stumbled over each other, screeching to a halt. 

Jeongin pointed. “What is that?”

The vine led to a square on the ground, where it seemed to disappear. Jeongin crept closer, tugging on the vine gently. Chan circled around him, leaning closer to examine the square on the floor.  
“This has to be the way out.” Chan ran his finger along the edge of the square. “It’s a hatch.” 

Jisung nodded. “The vine is alive, that means it’s coming from the outside, right?”

There didn’t seem to be a handle, and the gap where the vine came in wasn’t big enough for Chan to get his finger in. 

“Wait, the knife!” Jisung stood suddenly, turning to run back toward the room they came from. Woojin followed behind him, afraid that Jisung would probably run with it and end up stabbing himself. They entered the room with the box, surprised to see Minho still standing before it, transfixed. 

“H-hey Minho.” Jisung stammered, coming around beside him. “You okay?”

Minho closed the lid, turning to examine Jisung. “Yeah I just… wanted to read it again.”

Woojin frowned, taken aback by the panicked look on Minho’s face. He was scared. “We found a hatch. We need the knife to open it.” He opened the lid just enough to retrieve the knife. He let it close back as he pulled his hand out. “I… don’t really want to see who it says for me.” Woojin turned the knife over in his hand, examining the hilt. It was finely carved, he noticed. Strange to think one of them was meant to kill another with something so beautiful. 

Jisung pressed a hand against Minho’s back. “Let’s go, we might be able to get out of here.” Minho nodded.

They returned to the others, Woojin dropping down immediately to pry the knife into the edge of the hatch. Chan strained his fingers, trying to pull up on it. The knife scraped against the floor, the sound making their skin crawl. 

Finally the hatch popped, the knife slipping underneath. Woojin twisted the knife, making space enough for Chan to get his fingers underneath. Together, they pried the door open, lifting it up off the floor. Everyone gathered around to peer into the new opening in the ground. 

“A LADDER,” Seungmin shouted. “IT DOESN’T LOOK VERY DEEP!”

Woojin gripped the knife carefully between his teeth, dropping down and hooking his feet over the rungs of the ladder. He disappeared into the hole in the floor, everyone watching as he descended. It didn’t take long for him to reach the bottom, looking up at them. He took the knife out of his mouth and shouted up. “Who’s next?” 

Jeongin dropped down, gripping the ladder with tense fingers. Felix watched as Woojin guided him down, setting him safely onto the floor. Jisung was next, and then Changbin. Hyunjin gestured to Felix, so he went next. The others made their way down as well. Minho and Chan were last. 

Minho went to climb down, when Chan grabbed his arm. His voice was low. “What did yours say?”

Minho blinked at him, trying to keep his face neutral. “What do you mean?”

“I noticed you didn’t come running with the others. You stayed behind.” His eyes bored into him, but in them, there was concern. “You don’t have to tell me. But you seem upset.”

Minho thought for a second, his mouth opening and closing a couple of times before he spoke. “Myself.”

Chan tilted his head. “What?”

Minho sighed. “It told me to kill myself.” 

Wide eyed, Chan stared at him. “That’s not… what I was expecting.”

Minho looked at him, blank. “What were you expecting?”

Chan shook his head. “I guess what I was expecting wouldn’t make sense, anyway.” 

Minho looked at him sadly. “You remember a lot more than you’re telling us, don’t you Chan?”

He nodded. “There are some things I can’t tell you. There are things about yourselves you need to discover on your own. Some decisions you guys need to make for your present selves, not because of your past selves. I don’t want you guys to have to choose things just because they were things you chose in the past. I want you guys to be whatever you want, do whatever you want, love whoever you want.” He looked up, a sad smile. “Love got us into this mess, you know?”

“Love?”

Chan looked down, the other boys chattering excitedly, looking around the new space. “Yeah. I think it’ll get us out of this, too.” 

“Will you answer one question for me, Chan?”

“Maybe.”

Minho took a deep breath. “Why did it tell me to kill myself?”

Chan was quiet for a long moment. “To hurt someone else.” 

“Someone else?” 

“Someone who would be devastated to be without you.” 

Minho looked down into the hole in the floor. “Someone cares about me that much?” He thought about the voice he heard that night. The voice that said it _loved him._

Chan’s lip quivered. He nodded. “Let’s get down there.” 

They proceeded down the ladder, joining the others. It was a dark passageway, with plain concrete walls and a small light on the ceiling every twenty feet or so, just enough to see by. They started walking, following the vine. It led them further and further down, and slowly the vines grew. There were two, and then three strands, and then eventually the walls were covered in vines. They must be getting closer to the end. 

Felix was surprised when they came up upon a wall with a ladder attached, just like the one that brought them down. There seemed to be a hatch above, but it was so dark it was hard to tell. Jisung rolled up his sleeves and started up the ladder. 

Everyone looked up, watching as he neared the ceiling. When he got up there, he clung to the ladder with one hand and tentatively pushing up on the ceiling with the other. There was a bit of give, but not much. When he pushed up, light streamed in around the edges. “I think it’s stuck!” Jisung shouted. 

The others groaned. “THERE’S NO WAY WE MADE IT THIS FAR AND THEN CAN’T GET OUT!” Seungmin shouted back. 

Jisung growled. “Well obviously!” He pushed harder, rattling the hatch. He stepped up even further on the ladder, pressing his upper body into it. “It’s giving a little!”

The others gathered around, just in case Jisung fell. He pushed as hard as he could, grunting with the effort. The hatch rattled, and rattled, and rattled.

Suddenly it swung open, and Jisung grabbed onto the ladder, trying not to fall. Light streamed down on them, but then a shadow covered the hatch. 

A laugh came from above as a young man leaned over, looking down at them through big, round glasses. “I’ll be damned, you motherfuckers are actually still alive.” He grinned brightly. “I owe Seungcheol five dollars.”

Chan smiled, shielding his eyes from the sunlight that shone down on them. “Jae!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to continue this story as planned, ot9 forever


	12. Chapter 12

Felix dusted himself off, watching Jae help Woojin out of the hatch. Chan followed, the last one. He pulled Jae into a hug once he was out. 

Felix looked around him. The sun blared down on the field surrounding them. They stood in a flat, barren area of dirt, but all around them was grass. A bit further away, there was a dense forest of trees and bushes. Two trucks were parked in the dirt not far from where he stood. He turned around, shocked to see the building behind him, the one they'd just escaped. It was enormous, blotting out most of the sky. There seemed to be multiple buildings, connected by tunnels. There was only one door at the front, no windows. Above the door, a decaying sign read "SAFE HAVEN RESEARCH CENTER". 

A sound behind Felix made him turn with a start. Another boy jumped out of the smaller truck, walking over to where he stood. He had a large rifle strapped to his back, and Felix might have been afraid if it wasn't for the boy's goofy smile. "Hey, Felix!"

Felix grinned, unsure. 

"Ah, you don't remember me. That's alright." The boy grinned even brighter. "I'm Dowoon."

Felix felt a tickle in his brain then. "Dowoon…" he muttered. 

Dowoon pushed his hair back, shaking it out of his eyes. "You'll remember soon enough, I didn't remember shit either, before I crossed the border."

Felix tilted his head. "The border?"

Chan shouted for them all to gather around. Felix tottered over, exhaustion permeating his entire body. He leaned against Hyunjin for support. He heard Hyunjin sigh, relieved. He reached his arm around Felix's shoulders, steadying him. 

Chan turned back to Jae. "They don't remember anything yet, pretty much." 

Jae shrugged. "Neither did we, but the virus starts working pretty fast."

Chan perked up. "The virus? It's working?"

Jae nodded, pulling his phone from his pocket. There was a file there, called _dev notes._ "I thought it was bullshit as usual when Jeonghan sent me this, back before all this." He tucked his phone back in his pocket. "Turns out, he was right. We're just lucky my phone was in my bag and they didn't destroy it." 

Chan shook his head, trying to process. "So how long have you been out?"

Dowoon shrugged. "A little under 48 hours. We've mostly been hiding in the bushes over there." He pointed to the area where the forest began. 

Jae continued. "Everyone else is probably back in District 9 by now. We were sent here to make sure you escaped, but we had to hunker down for a while. It took me a long time to find the right hatch, too." 

Woojin spoke up, his voice nearly gone after everything today. "What happened here?"

Jae adjusted his glasses. "We started planning a breakout, three months ago. Most of the unit members were locked down, just like you guys. We decided we'd had enough, and we were going to get out, by force if we had to. There were a few of us who were 'trusted' or whatever, the ones in the gray scrubs. They had jobs, helping the researchers, but we were all in on the plot. They should have known better than to expect us to betray our units." He chuckled. 

"Jeonghan was the one planning it originally, so Hansol picked up where he left off. We formed a solid plan, and we waited. The next time we were allowed out at night, we struck. It was the night before last. We hit them with whatever we could grab, and we didn't back down. We didn't want violence, but after…" he trailed off, eyes falling to Hyunjin's bloody slacks. "Shooting one of us in the head wasn't exactly the best way to keep us subservient." 

Dowoon spoke up. "Most of the keepers and the researchers escaped. They have some underground tunnel, leading to God-knows-where. Flagg took off down that way, but some of the keepers stayed to fight."

\-----

There was shouting everywhere. Dowoon ran down the hallway, the red light disorienting him. Some of the trusted ones ran past him, toward the front, to the only door. Dowoon had a different mission. 

Hansol ran up behind him. "Seen one yet?"

Dowoon shook his head. They were looking for a keeper, someone who might have keys. Most of the units were still locked in their cells. Dowoon's heart clenched as he thought of them all. 

The two started moving, keeping low and against the wall. They winced, hearing gunshots. Dowoon stuck his head around the corner just in time to see Mingyu knock a keeper unconscious with a metal chair. Dowoon motioned to Hansol and they ran over. Mingyu took the keeper's gun, his other hand pressed hard to his shoulder. Blood seeped through his fingers. 

Hansol started rifling through the keeper's pockets. "Are you okay, Gyu?"

Mingyu nodded. "I'm fine. I'm going to help escort the others out." He ran off, turning the corner at the end of the hallway, gun tucked in the waistband of his gray scrubs. 

Hansol groaned, standing. "No keys." 

They ran down two more hallways, finally coming to a room with a large window and a bank of computers. Hansol flung open the door, stepping inside. A keeper sat in the middle, barely visible in the red light. He looked up as they entered.

Hansol and Dowoon froze, ready for the man to pull a gun. He was the chubby attendant, they'd seen him around. He'd always been relatively kind to them, but things were different now. 

He sighed, fumbling in his pocket. Dowoon squeezed his eyes shut, ready for the bang. Instead, there came a jingling sound. He opened one eye. The keeper was holding up a set of keys. He began to speak. "There are some overrides that only Flagg has the key for. I can't open any doors except for the cell doors, but at least you can let them out. Give them a chance." His eyes flicked up to Hansol's. 

Hansol grimaced. "Why are you helping us? What do you want?" 

The man shook his head. "Nothing. After what they did to your brother, I realized what was really happening here. But it was much too late." He jingled the keys again. "This is the least I can do." 

Hansol took the keys, turning them over in his hand. There were some metal keys and a keycard. There was a keychain on them, a small teddy bear dangling from a chain. "I've seen these before." 

The man nodded. "Jeonghan stole them from me that night. That's how he got in here and changed the programs. I knew he took them. I didn't report them stolen, but they saw the activity on the server and they traced it back. I didn't expect Flagg to do what he did." The man lifted his right hand. His pinky finger was missing. "I got punished too, but… not as bad." 

Hansol stared at him, his face morphing between anger and sadness. He cleared his throat. "Don't blame yourself. We made the choice. We came in here that night just to find the blueprints, after I'd heard the rumor about the vine that kept growing through the hatch in The Nine's ward." He signed. "I knew we'd get caught, but there was no other way out. We had to try. We couldn't stage an uprising if it meant the others would be trapped in here." He sat in a chair across from the man. "We knew we were both probably dead already, so we did everything we could. We sent messages to a few people. He scrambled the GPS signals in the program again. He decided to connect Felix and Hyunjin, so they could talk. He'd been watching the cameras and he knew Felix was losing himself. Losing the will to live. It was worth a shot to try to bring him back." 

The man hung his head, nodding as Hansol finished. "You should hurry. In the case of an emergency, the plan was always to abandon this place and leave you all in your cells to starve. Flagg and the others are already long gone, I'm sure." He stood, making his way to the door. He turned back to them before he went. "I know they're going to to kill me, but I'll take as many of them with me as I can." He slipped through the door and was gone. 

Dowoon turned to see Hansol already inserting the keycard into the console and typing in commands. The huge screen on the wall showed a layout of the building, and most of the cells were still red, locked. Hansol typed furiously, navigating directories. Dowoon watched as the cells changed from red to green. Unit Nine was still red. 

Hansol sighed, frustrated. "There's extra security for The Nine. I don't know why."

Dowoon turned to him. "Flagg is afraid of them. They started the war, after all. And they're stronger than most of us." 

"I guess that makes sense." Finally, the last cells turned green on the screen. Hansol yanked the keys back, shoving them in his pocket. "That's all of them, we have to go." 

\-----

"We raced to the front door, just as Mingyu and Sungjin were breaking it down. We scattered, most everyone heading toward District 9, but others stayed behind to wait for the rest of their groups to escape."

Jisung nodded, curious. "Did everyone else have to get through the maze?"

Jae shook his head. "You guys were the only ones who had a maze. Everyone else just had a hatch in their common room, behind a false wall. You guys were in a much larger area than everyone else. We were beginning to worry you guys wouldn't find your hatch, so I was about to come in and get you." 

Minho spoke up. "What did you mean, that we started a war?" 

Jae frowned, turning to Chan. "Man, they really _don't_ remember, huh?" 

Chan nodded. "But if the virus is working, they'll remember soon enough."

Dowoon stepped in. "Once you get outside of the perimeter of this place, the virus will start working." He pointed to the tree line. "There's something about this property that locks down our chips. I think it also handicaps us. Some people said they got their vision back, their hearing back, after they crossed over. The other three members of our group were blind, but they can see now that they're across."

The boys looked around at each other. Jeongin reached up, touching his cheek below the eye that couldn't see. He grinned. 

Jae clapped Chan on the shoulder. "We gotta get moving. Who knows, they might send someone out here to check it out eventually." He motioned for them to follow him as he walked over to the larger truck. It looked like a bus, but with an open top. It was long and had enough seats for all of them. Jae swung himself up through the back door. "Seungcheol found these for you." He leaned down, picking up a large bookbag and tossing it to Chan. 

Chan looked at it with wide eyes. "My bag?" 

Jae grinned, jumping back down out of the truck. "All of your bags are up there. Maybe there's some stuff that will jog your memories before you get across the border."

Dowoon walked around, removing the rifle from his back and placing it across the backseat of the other truck, which looked more like a Jeep. "The virus does take its time, though. You won't remember it all at once. I'm still remembering things, over time."

Jae shrugged. "There's probably memories we'll never get back. But this is better than nothing."

Chan set the bag down, pulling Jae into a hug. "Thank you for staying behind for us."

Jae giggled, punching Chan's shoulder. "It's no problem man. You all saved me once, least I can do is return the favor." He jumped in the passenger seat of the Jeep as Dowoon turned the key. Jae waved at them, shouting back. "I'll see you guys in District 9!"

The Jeep took off, kicking up dirt as it went. The boys stared until it disappeared into the distance. Chan hopped up in the truck, his bag slung over his shoulder. Felix followed him, grabbing the metal doorframe and swinging himself up. There were seats on either side, and two seats at the front. The truck was huge, enough space for all of them to be comfortable. There were bags shoved under the seats, all of various colors and styles. "How do we know which is which?"

Chan began pulling the bags out. "I remember which one belonged to who." He yanked out a black bag, covered in patches. He held it up to Felix. "This was yours." Felix took the strap in his hand. The first thing from his old life. He examined the patches on the front. One was a black cat, surrounded by white stars. One patch said Fuck off and die. There was a small enamel pin, in the shape of a red rose. He ran his finger over the edge of it. 

"What all is in these?" Jeongin asked when Chan handed him his bag. 

Chan leaned down, pulling out the rest. "Hopefully our clothes. Maybe our phones. Before we left, we gathered everything that meant anything to us. Hopefully all that is still there." 

Felix sat down, unzipping the top. Hyunjin sat across from him, his own bag in his lap. It was galaxy print. Felix smiled. 

He opened the top, peering in. There were clothes in here, and a pair of shoes. He pulled the shoes out, turning them over in his hands. They were well worn, the soles looking a little bare. He sat them down on the seat beside him, digging through the rest of the bag. 

The other members gathered around, each digging through their bags. Jisung couldn't wait, he'd already tugged off the suffocating white shirt and slipped into the black T-shirt he'd found. He brought the collar up to his nose, inhaling forcefully. 

Felix kept digging. His bag was quite full. There was a book, some small trinkets, and a second shirt. His phone was in a pocket and he tried to power it on, but it was dead. 

The others chattered and showed each other what they'd found. Seungmin had found some photos, and several of the other boys leaned over his shoulder as he flipped through. Chan grinned, watching them. His own bag sat unopened at his feet. 

Felix looked back to his bag, taking out the book that was inside. He flipped through the first few pages. They were handwritten. _My journal?_ The handwriting looked familiar, it could possibly be his. He flipped through a few more pages, skimming. He turned one more page and stopped. There was something pressed into the spine of the book. He took it out carefully, holding it between his fingers. It was a pressed flower, faded red and green. The memory struck him like lightning. 

_A hand, holding the rose out to him. Felix stood under a streetlight, just outside of their safe house. The red bloom was beautiful; roses were his favorite flower, but he'd never seen a real one, only pictures. Until now. _

_A voice. Familiar. "I know it's not the time for this. It's crazy to be thinking about stuff like this when a revolution is going on." The hand shook a little. Try as he might, Felix couldn't remember who it belonged to, who it was that was talking. That part was still fuzzy, but the words came to him now. "I can't help it, Felix. I'm in love with you."_

_He remembered feeling his heart skip a beat, his chest swelling with emotion. He took the rose in his own shaking hand. "I'm in love with you too." _

He blinked, staring hard at the dried flower. He was in love? Someone confessed to him? With this rose…

He tucked it carefully into the spine of the book. He flipped a few more pages, scanning for any mention of who it was from. He turned the pages furiously, looking for anything. Something fell from the book, sliding down into his book bag. He shut the journal and felt around inside the bag, searching for what fell. 

_A stack of Polaroids?_ He lifted them out. The first photo was a shot of all of them. Woojin was holding the camera, everyone else leaning out at various angles around him. Felix was near the back, a huge smile on his face. The next photo was one of him and Chan, Chan riding on Felix's back, his fingers making bunny ears behind Felix's head. He flipped to the next photo: one of Changbin and Jisung, each with a mouth full of noodles. Next was a photo of Felix and Dowoon, sitting on the floor of a dorm room, laughing hard. 

The next photo was him and Hyunjin. Hyunjin had his arm around Felix's shoulders, and they were both smiling brightly. It was dark, wherever they were, their faces lit by the flash. Hyunjin's hair was longer, the back of it hung down behind his ears. He looked a lot younger. Felix looked over the edge of the photo, at Hyunjin sitting across from him. Hyunjin was also leafing through a book. Felix smiled. They really had been friends all along. He looked back down at the photo. He noticed something sticking out behind the edge of it. Another Polaroid seemed to be stuck to the back of it. Felix carefully peeled them apart. 

He peered at the new photo, taking a second to understand what he was seeing. This one was dark too, also lit by flash. It was almost the same as the last photo, Hyunjin with his arm around Felix. But they weren't smiling; instead their lips were pressed to each other's. Felix felt heat sear across his face. They were kissing. His ears rang. He flicked his eyes back up at Hyunjin across from him. He still sat calmly, enthralled in his book. 

Felix looked back to the photo. His hand was buried in Hyunjin's hair. Hyunjin was holding onto him tightly. Wait, neither of them were holding the camera. Who took this photo? 

_The flash went off and Felix yanked his mouth from Hyunjin's. Hyunjin blinked in surprise. The room was already dark but now after the flash, Felix couldn't see a thing. An evil giggle came from behind the camera. Felix felt Hyunjin chuckle too. _

_"What the fuck, Minho?"_

_Felix sighed. "Why'd you take that?" _

_Minho shrugged, shaking the photo. "I dunno, I just figured you guys might want it one day." He grinned. "Here, pose again, I'll take another one."_

_Felix felt Hyunjin's arm around him, and he smiled widely. The next flash blinded him too. Minho smiled, pulling the photo out of the camera. "That one's gonna be good." _

_"Hey, now take one of us!" _

_Someone was standing behind Minho. That voice… Felix recognized it. The memory was fuzzy, it was so close, who was it?_

"Chan?" Minho spoke, shaking Felix from the memory. "Wh- What is this?"

Felix looked up. Minho held out his hand, a small metal ring in his palm. It was silver, plain except for a tiny diamond set into one side. It looked handmade, pretty close but not perfectly round. 

Felix looked at Chan. He was pale, his throat bobbing as he swallowed heavily. 

Minho stared down at the ring. "Am I… married?"

Chan shook his head. "Engaged."

Minho looked at Chan, and then around at the others. "To who? You said someone loves me? Someone didn't want to lose me? Is this what you meant?"

Chan nodded, taking a deep breath. "Try to remember." He was trying not to cry. "You have to remember."

Minho turned the ring over in his hand. He ran his thumb around the inside, feeling the smooth metal. He took it in his other hand, slowly slipping it onto his left ring finger. He stared at it there, his hand starting to tremble. 

Felix watched Minho's face. He stared at his hand with his brow furrowed in concentration. The room was silent, everyone waiting for his reaction. His eyes slowly grew larger, his brow relaxing. Memories were dawning on him. Felix could see the emotion playing out across his face. He clenched and unclenched his hands, worrying his lip between his teeth. His breath quickened, his eyes wide and disbelieving. 

But then his face darkened. His mouth dropped open with a strangled noise, his eyes suddenly wild. "No, Chan?" He looked up in panic. "No, it's not true. Chan please, tell me… Tell me I'm wrong? Please, Chan!" Chan sat in silence, his eyes swimming. Minho stood suddenly, begging now. "No, no! Tell me I'm wrong! Please!"

Chan looked up at him, the tears rolling free. "I'm sorry." 

Felix turned back. Minho was frozen, staring down at his hand. Tears spilled over his eyelids, just as he yanked the ring off his finger. Felix watched it hit the floor and roll, coming to rest right beside his foot. Minho sobbed loudly, leaping down from the back of the truck and taking off running. 

The others gasped, some standing to go after him. Jisung stopped in the doorway, turning to Chan. "What the fuck was that? Who is he engaged to?"

Chan wiped his eyes, stifling a sob of his own. Felix reached down to pick up the ring, feeling the weight of it in his own palm. It felt dense, heavy. He looked up as Chan squeezed his eyes shut. "He was engaged to Jeonghan." He dropped his head into his hands. 

The others froze. Hyunjin's jaw dropped. 

The memory clicked in Felix's head.

_"Hey, now take one of us!" Jeonghan leaned out from behind Minho. Felix could remember his face clearly now, his sharp eyes and pale skin, his long hair tucked back with an elastic. He took the camera from Minho, holding it out. "Will you take one, Felix?"_

_It triggered a second memory. Felix in his cell, sitting in his bed._

_"Felix."_

_That voice._

_That was the voice that spoke to him, the night before Hyunjin appeared. The night before Jeonghan died. _

**Author's Note:**

> This is a long boi but I've gotten quite a bit written already so please stick with me! Content warnings: there will be quite a bit of violence and some death (no skz members die), but I swear I won't leave you guys with a sad ending. Everyone will be okay somehow, promise
> 
> Also yes I have another fanfiction I should be writing but I'm almost done with it too please don't kill me~ ^^


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